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The Duke said, 鈥淢ay I ask what is meant by respecting oneself?鈥 Confucius replied, 鈥淲hen a gentleman speaks too much, the people will make excuses; when he acts too much, the people will make examples. If a gentleman does not speak too much and does not act too much, the people will respect him without being ordered. In this way, he can respect himself; if he can respect himself, he can complete his parents. 鈥漈he Duke said, 鈥淢ay I ask what is meant by completing his parents?鈥 Confucius replied, 鈥淎 gentleman is a name for people. The people call him a son of a gentleman. This is to make their parents become gentlemen, and this is to complete their parents鈥 name!鈥 Confucius then said, 鈥淚n ancient times, the most important thing in governing was to love people. If you cannot love people, you cannot have your body; if you cannot have your body, you cannot be at peace with your land; if you cannot be at peace with your land, you cannot be happy with heaven; if you cannot be happy with heaven, you cannot complete your body.鈥
Confucius said: Those who make Mingqi know the way of funeral, and they prepare things but cannot use them. Alas! The dead are used with the utensils of the living. Isn't it dangerous to use them as sacrifices? Mingqi means to show the gods. Painting carts with straw spirits has existed since ancient times, and it is the way of Mingqi. Confucius said that those who make straw spirits are good, and those who make figurines are unkind - isn't it dangerous to use people!
Pei Linggong has a handsome appearance. He looks good without his crown or in rough clothes or with messy hair. People at that time thought she was a "jade woman". Those who saw it said: "Seeing Uncle Pei is like walking up a jade mountain, with light shining on people."
When Wei Si Tu Jingzi died, Zixia offered condolences. The host had not yet buried him, so he went there in mourning clothes. Ziyou went to mourn. After the host had buried him, Ziyou came out, wearing mourning clothes and crying. Zixia asked, "Did you hear that?" He said, "I heard from you, Master, that if the host has not changed his clothes, he should not wear mourning clothes." Zengzi said, "Yanzi can be said to know etiquette, and he is respectful." Youruo said, "Yanzi wore the same fox fur coat for thirty years, and sent one carriage to the tomb and returned; the king had seven carriages, and the ministers had five carriages. How could Yanzi know etiquette?" Zengzi said, "If a country is not governed by the Way, a gentleman will be ashamed to be full of etiquette. If the state is extravagant, then show it frugality; if the state is frugal, then show it etiquette.
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