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The etiquette for being a son is: be warm in winter and cool in summer, be alert at dusk and check on others in the morning, and do not argue with the ugly and the barbaric.
When Yang Fu died at the age of 31, Huan Xuan wrote to Yang Xin: "You were so virtuous and trusted, but you died of a sudden illness. How can I express my sorrow?"
Shan Jilun was the governor of Jingzhou, and he often went out for fun. People composed a song about it, saying: "Shan Gong was drunk once, and went straight to Gaoyang Pond. He returned home without a care in the world, and knew nothing about tea. He could ride a fine horse, and chopsticks upside down on the fence. He raised his hand and asked Ge Qiang, how he compared to the boy from Bingzhou?" Gaoyang Pond is in Xiangyang. Qiang was his favorite general, and was from Bingzhou.
In ancient times, the emperor established six palaces, three wives, nine concubines, twenty-seven wives, and eighty-one imperial wives to listen to the internal governance of the world and to show the obedience of women; therefore, the world was harmonious and the family was orderly. The emperor established six officials, three dukes, nine ministers, twenty-seven great officials, and eighty-one nobles to listen to the external governance of the world and to clarify the male education of the world; therefore, the country is governed when the outside is harmonious. Therefore, it is said: The emperor listens to male education, and the queen listens to female obedience; the emperor manages the yang way, and the queen manages the yin virtue; the emperor listens to external governance, and the queen listens to internal duties. Teaching obedience becomes a custom, the outside and the inside are harmonious, and the country is governed, this is called great virtue.
Chen Yuanfang's son Changwen was a talented person. He and Ji Fang's son Xiaoxian each discussed the merits and virtues of his father, but could not reach a conclusion, so they consulted Taiqiu. Taiqiu said: "Yuanfang is difficult to be a brother, and Jifang is difficult to be a younger brother."
When Ruan Ji's mother died, he enjoyed wine and meat in the presence of King Wen of Jin. Si Li He Zeng was also present and said, "Your Excellency is ruling the world with filial piety, but Ruan Ji is in a state of mourning and is seen drinking and eating meat in front of you. You should exile him overseas to correct the morals." King Wen said, "The successor to the throne is so disgraced, and you cannot share my sorrow. What's the point? Besides, drinking and eating meat when one is ill is a mourning custom!" Ji continued to drink and eat, looking calm.
Kong Tingwei gave the fur coat to his cousin Chen, but Chen refused to accept it. The Chief Justice said, "Yan Pingzhong was so frugal that he offered sacrifices to his ancestors. He wore a pig's shoulder that was not enough to cover his bowl, and he also wore a fox fur coat for decades. Why do you refuse this?" So he accepted it and wore it.
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