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When Wei Si Tu Jingzi died, Zixia offered condolences. The host had not yet buried him, so he went there in mourning clothes. Ziyou went to mourn. After the host had buried him, Ziyou came out, wearing mourning clothes and crying. Zixia asked, "Did you hear that?" He said, "I heard from you, Master, that if the host has not changed his clothes, he should not wear mourning clothes." Zengzi said, "Yanzi can be said to know etiquette, and he is respectful." Youruo said, "Yanzi wore the same fox fur coat for thirty years, and sent one carriage to the tomb and returned; the king had seven carriages, and the ministers had five carriages. How could Yanzi know etiquette?" Zengzi said, "If a country is not governed by the Way, a gentleman will be ashamed to be full of etiquette. If the state is extravagant, then show it frugality; if the state is frugal, then show it etiquette.

Zigong asked Confucius, "May I ask why gentlemen value jade and despise enamel? Is it because jade is scarce and enamel is plentiful?" Confucius said, "It is not because enamel is plentiful that they despise it, but because jade is scarce that they value it. In the past, gentlemen compared virtues to jade: warm and moist, it is benevolence; meticulous and fine, it is knowledge; incorruptible but not sharp, it is righteousness; hanging like a string, it is courtesy; knocking, the sound is clear and long, and it bends at the end, it is music; flaws do not cover the beauty, and beauty does not cover the flaws, it is loyalty; trustworthiness is everywhere, it is trustworthiness; aura is like a white rainbow, it is heaven; spirit is seen in mountains and rivers, it is earth; jade is outstanding, it is virtue. What is valued by all in the world is the Tao. The Book of Songs says, 'When I think of a gentleman, he is as warm as jade.' Therefore, gentlemen value it."

When Zhong Yu brothers were young, their father took a nap during the day, so they secretly drank medicinal wine together. His father woke up at the time and pretended to sleep to watch. Yu bowed before drinking, and drank together without bowing. Then he asked Yu why he bowed, Yu said: "Wine is the rite, I dare not not bow." He asked Hui why he did not bow, Hui said: "Stealing is not rite, so I do not bow."

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The ceremony of shooting at the betrothal is the greatest ceremony. It is performed when the weather is bright, and the ceremony is completed when the day is almost up. It cannot be performed without a strong person. Therefore, a strong person will perform the rites. When the wine is clear, people will not dare to drink when they are thirsty; when the meat is dry, people will not dare to eat when they are hungry; when the day is not over, people will be solemn and upright, and will not dare to be lazy. To complete the rites, to correct the ruler and his subjects, to be close to fathers and sons, and to reconcile the old and the young. This is difficult for ordinary people, but gentlemen perform it, so it is called having rites; having rites is called having righteousness, and having righteousness is called courage. Therefore, what is valuable in courage is that it can establish righteousness; what is valuable in establishing righteousness is that it has rites; what is valuable in having rites is that it performs rites. Therefore, what is valuable in courage is that it dares to perform rites and righteousness. Therefore, a brave and strong person, when there is no trouble in the world, uses it in propriety and righteousness; when there is trouble in the world, uses it in victory. If used in victory, there will be no enemy; if used in propriety and righteousness, there will be order and harmony; no enemy outside, and order and harmony inside, this is called great virtue. Therefore, the sage king values bravery and strength in this way. If bravery and strength are not used in propriety and righteousness to win, but used in fighting, it is called chaos. When punishment is carried out in the country, those who are punished are chaos. In this way, the people will be governed and the country will be safe.

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