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When Zuo Taichong first completed his "San Du Fu", people at that time ridiculed him and he was not satisfied. Later showed it to Mr. Zhang. Zhang said, "These two capitals can be three, but your literary talent is not well-respected in the world, so it is better to find a scholar with high reputation." Si then consulted Huangfu Mi. Mi sighed when he saw it, and then wrote a preface for it. As a result, all those who were not disloyal to the previous prime minister bowed their heads and praised him.
Ziyou asked Confucius, and Confucius said, "No! Establish the grandson."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Wang Ningzhi thanked his wife for going to the Wang family and looked down upon him. Now that I have returned to the Xie family, I feel very sorry for you. The Grand Tutor comforted him and said, "Wang Lang is the son of Yi Shao. He is not a bad person. Why do you hate him?" He replied, "Among my uncles, there are A Da and Zhong Lang. Among my brothers, there are Feng, Hu, E and Mo. I never expected that there would be Wang Lang in this world!"
Ziyun said: "If the superiors consider the words of the people, then the heaven will give them favors; if the superiors do not consider the words of the people, then they will be offended; if the heaven does not give them favors, then there will be chaos. ”Therefore, if a gentleman governs the people with trust and humility, the people will repay him with respect. The Book of Songs says, “The ancients had a saying: consult with common people.”
Respect, prudence, and correctness before treating each other with affection, is the general principle of etiquette, and it is the way to establish the distinction between men and women, and the righteousness of husband and wife. There is a distinction between men and women, and then there is righteousness between husband and wife; there is righteousness between husband and wife, and then there is affection between father and son; there is affection between father and son, and then there is affection between ruler and minister. Correct. Therefore, it is said that the wedding ceremony is the root of etiquette.
When the king meets the guests, and the king bestows the title, they all bow twice and kowtow, and then rise to bow, which shows the etiquette of the ministers; the king returns the bow, and all the courtesy is returned, which shows the etiquette of the king. Ministers try their best to make contributions to the country, and the monarch will reward them with titles and salaries. Therefore, ministers should try their best to make contributions, so the country is safe and the monarch is at peace. There is no ritual that is not answered, which means that the superior does not take in vain from the subordinates. The superior must clarify the right way to guide the people, and the people follow the way and make contributions, and then take one tenth of it, so the superior has enough and the subordinate is not short of it; so the superior and the subordinate are in harmony and do not resent each other. Harmony and peace are the purpose of rituals; this is the great righteousness of the superior and the subordinate. Therefore, it is said that the banquet ritual is to clarify the righteousness of the superior and the subordinate.
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