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When parents are ill, those who wear hats do not comb their hair, walk do not gallop, talk do not lazily, do not play the zither and the qin, eat meat without changing its taste, drink wine without changing its appearance, laugh do not laugh too loudly, and be angry without swearing. The disease stops and returns to normal.
Huan Xuan went west and entered Shitou. The outsider said, "Sima Liang Wang has fled and rebelled." Xuan had already made up his mind, and he played horns and drums on the carriage, and sang loudly, "The sound of flutes and pipes remains, where is Liang Wang?"
Zeng Zi asked: "After the wedding ceremony, the money is paid and there is an auspicious day, if the girl's parents die, what should be done?" Confucius said: "The husband sends condolences. If the husband's parents die, the girl's family also sends condolences. Father's death is called father, mother's death is called mother. If parents are not alive, uncle's mother is called. After the husband is buried, the husband's uncle tells the girl: 'So-and-so's son has lost his parents, and cannot be a brother, so-and-so tells the girl.' The girl agrees, but dares not marry. This is rite. The husband is exempted from mourning. The girl's parents send people to invite him, but the husband refuses to accept him, and then he marries her. This is rite. If the girl's parents die, the husband also does the same. "
Offering sacrifices and offering wine are respectful etiquette. Eating lungs is a ritual. Spitting wine is a ritual. At the end of the feast, it means that this is the main part of the feast, not just for eating and drinking, but for performing rituals. This is why rituals are valued and money is despised. After the cup is finished, it is placed on the west steps, which means that the feast is not just for eating and drinking. This is the meaning of putting rituals first and money second. If rituals are put first and money second, people will be respectful and yield without fighting.
Whenever Xi Chao heard that someone wanted to retire to a noble place, he would raise funds worth millions for them and build them a residence. He built a house for Dai Gong in Shan, which was very fine. Dai Shi went to his old residence and wrote to his relatives, saying, "I have just arrived in Shan and it is like an official residence." Xi also arranged for Fu to raise funds of one million yuan, but Fu was busy with some secret matters and therefore he was not left behind.
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