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Ruan Ji's sister-in-law once came back home, and Ji saw her and said goodbye to her. Or ridicule it. Ji said, "Is the etiquette designed for people like us?"
A gentleman has three worries: if he has not heard it, he worries that he will not be able to hear it; if he has heard it, he worries that he will not be able to learn it; if he has learned it, he worries that he will not be able to practice it. A gentleman has five shames: if he is in his position but does not speak the right words, he is ashamed; if he has the right words but does not act the right words, he is ashamed; if he has gained it and then lost it, he is ashamed; if the land is surplus but the people are insufficient, he is ashamed; if the number of people is equal but double, he is ashamed.
The Master said: "Foolish and self-righteous, lowly and self-centered, born in this world, go against the ancient ways: such people will bring disaster to themselves." If you are not the Son of Heaven, you cannot discuss rituals, establish systems, or examine texts. Today, the world has the same track for vehicles, the same writing, and the same ethics. Even if you have the position, if you do not have the virtue, you dare not create rituals and music; even if you have the virtue, if you do not have the position, you dare not create rituals and music. Confucius said: "I explained the Xia rituals, but Qi was not enough to prove it. I learned the Yin rituals, and Song still has them. I learned the Zhou rituals, and now I use them, so I follow Zhou."
Wang Yifu once was assigned to work by a clan member, but he hadn't done anything for some time. When they were having a feast, Wang Yifu said to the clan member, "You are assigned to work for an elder recently, so how can you not do it?" The clan member got very angry and threw a stick in his face. Yi Fu was speechless. After washing up, he took Prime Minister Wang's arm and was carried away together. He looked in the mirror in the carriage and said to the Prime Minister: "The way you look at me is like looking at an ox's back."
When Taifu Xie was sailing eastward, a villain was guiding the boat, sometimes slowing down, sometimes speeding up, sometimes stopping, sometimes waiting, and also letting the boat go sideways, causing it to hit people and crash into the shore. The Duke did not reprimand him at first. People say that you are never angry or happy. I once accompanied my brother on his return from a funeral in the west. It was a rainy day and we were all drunk, so I couldn't do anything about it. The Duke then took the carriage pillar and hit the driver with a very loud and fierce sound. Water is calm and gentle in nature, but it rushes violently when it enters a narrow passage. The local people are well aware that in a remote and isolated place, it is impossible to preserve their purity.
Chen Taiqiu made an appointment with his friend to go out at noon. He did not arrive after passing the middle, so Taiqiu gave up. After he left, he arrived. Yuan Fang was seven years old at the time and was playing outside the door. The guest asked Yuan Fang, "Is your father here?" He replied, "I waited for you for a long time but you didn't come, so I left." His friend was angry and said, "What a cruel person! He made an appointment with someone and then left without saying goodbye." Yuan Fang said, "You made an appointment with my father at noon. If you don't come at noon, you are untrustworthy; if you scold your father in front of your son, you are rude." His friend was ashamed and got off the car to take him out. Yuan Fang walked in without paying any attention.
Someone asked Yuan Shizhong, "How does Yin Zhongkan compare to Han Kangbo?" He replied, "In terms of reason and righteousness, it is hard to tell who is better or worse; but in the quiet courtyard, there are still famous scholars, and Yin is not as good as Han." Therefore, Yin wrote a eulogy: "Jingmen is closed during the day, and the idle courtyard is peaceful."
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