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Wang Changshi wrote to the Grand Marshal, "He knows where to go and is worthy of being a part of the conversation."
Wang Ling went to see Xie Gong, and found Xi Zaochi was already sitting there, so he was supposed to lie on the same couch with him. The king wandered around without sitting down, so the duke invited him to sit on the couch opposite him. After he left, he said to Hu'er, "Zi Jing is indeed upright and honest, but people are too proud of you, which really damages his naturalness."
When Yuan Shao was young, he sent people to throw Wei Wu with a sword at night.
Ziyun: "As for the father's hand, you can ride in his car but not wear his clothes. The gentleman uses this to expand filial piety." Confucius said: "The villain can all support their parents, but the gentleman is not respectful, how to distinguish?" Confucius said: "Father and son are not in the same position, so they are respectful." The Book of Documents says: "If you don't respect your ancestors, you will be disgraced." Confucius said: "When parents are alive, don't call them old, talk about filial piety but not kindness; inside the boudoir, play but don't sigh." The gentleman uses this to keep the people, and the people are still less filial and more kind. Confucius said: "The ruler of the people, the court respects the elderly, and then the people will be filial." Confucius said: "Sacrificial offerings have corpses, and they are the masters of the ancestral temples, which show the people that there is something to do. Repairing the ancestral temples and respecting the sacrifices are to teach the people to pursue filial piety." With this, the people still forget their parents.
Using jade and jade scepters to betroth is to attach importance to etiquette; returning jade and jade scepters after the betrothal is the meaning of ignoring money and valuing etiquette. The princes are strict with each other to despise money and value etiquette, so the people will be polite. When the lord entertains guests, he will go in and out three times, feed the guests in the house, and the five kinds of meat will be displayed inside. Thirty carts of rice, thirty carts of grain, and hay and firewood are all displayed outside. Five pairs of birds are mounted every day, and all the animals have food and meat. One meal is twice a meal, and there are countless gifts at banquets and occasions, so the etiquette is heavy. Ancient people could not use money in this way, but those who used money so generously said that they were very polite. If you follow the rites, the ruler and his subjects will not bully each other, and the subjects will not invade each other. Therefore, the emperor made it, and the princes should follow it.
Zengzi asked, "When the burial leads to the grave, if the sun is eclipsed, will there be changes? Or not?" Confucius said, "In the past, I followed Lao Dan to help with the burial in Xiangdang. When we reached the grave, the sun was eclipsed. Lao Dan said, 'Qiu! Stop the coffin, stand on the right side of the road, stop crying and wait for changes.' After daybreak, he turned back and went on. He said, 'It is the etiquette.' When the burial was reversed, Qiu asked, 'The coffin cannot be reversed. If the sun is eclipsed, how can we go if we don't know how late it will be?' Lao Dan said, 'The princes go to the emperor's court, and leave the sacrifice at the sun; the officials go to the emperor's court, and leave the sacrifice at the sun. The coffin does not leave early and does not stay late. Only criminals and those who go to the funeral of their parents go on the journey when they see the stars! The sun is eclipsed, how do you know that the stars are not visible? Moreover, a gentleman practices etiquette and does not take people's relatives as his concern. 'I heard Lao Dan say this.
Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
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