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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Emperor Xiaowu was very close to and respectful of Wang Guobao and Wang Ya. Ya recommended Wang Xun to the emperor, and the emperor wanted to meet him. Once at night, when he was talking with Guo Bao and Ya, the emperor felt a little drunk and lustful, so he ordered Xun to be called. When he was about to arrive, he heard the soldiers' message. Guo Bao knew that he was inferior to Wang Xun in talent and was afraid of losing his favor, so he said, "Wang Xun is a famous person today. Your Majesty should not see him with wine and women. You can issue another edict." The emperor agreed with his words and thought he was loyal, so he did not see Xun.
The betrothal gift is seven intermediaries for the upper duke, five intermediaries for the marquis and earl, and three intermediaries for the viscount and the man, so as to distinguish the noble from the humble. When introducing and conveying orders, a gentleman dares not question the one he respects, which is the utmost respect. After three concessions, he can convey the order, enter the temple gate after three concessions, reach the steps after three bows, and ascend after three concessions, so as to show respect and humility.
Sun Xinggong wrote a eulogy for Yu Gong, which contained many words of concern. When it was completed, he showed it to Yu Daoen. When Yu saw it, he sent it back with emotion, saying, "My ancestors and you would never have come to this."
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