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The etiquette for being a son is: be warm in winter and cool in summer, be alert at dusk and check on others in the morning, and do not argue with the ugly and the barbaric.
Huan Xuan asked Liu Taichang, "How am I compared to Xie Taifu?" Liu replied, "You are noble, while Taifu is profound." He asked again, "How am I compared to my virtuous uncle Zijing?" Liu replied, "Hawthorn, pear, orange, and grapefruit each have their own merits."
Kong Pushe was the attendant of Emperor Xiaowu, and was invited to visit Emperor Liezong's tomb in advance. Kong was the Minister of Rites at the time. He was thin and frail, and wore heavy mourning clothes. He cried all day long, and those who saw him thought he was a truly filial son.
Zhang Tianxi was the governor of Liangzhou and was in charge of the western part of the province. After being captured by Fu Jian, he was appointed as the Shizhong. Later, they were both defeated in Shouyang and went to the capital, where he was favored by Emperor Xiaowu. Every time I talk, it lasts all day long. There was a person who was jealous of him. He asked Zhang: "What is valuable in the north?" Zhang said: "Mulberry is sweet and fragrant, and owls are chirping. Pure cheese nourishes the nature, and people are not jealous."
Confucius said: "The Way is not far from people. If people practice the Way and distance themselves from others, they cannot be considered the Way. The Book of Songs says: 'Cut the wood, chop the wood, its principle is not far away.' Holding a stick to chop wood, looking at it from a distance, it still seems far away. Therefore, a gentleman governs people by their own way, and stops when he changes. Loyalty and forgiveness are not far from the Way. If you do not want to do it yourself, do not do it to others. There are four ways of a gentleman, and I have not been able to do any of them. What I ask of my son is to serve my father, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my minister is to serve my king, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my younger brother is to serve my elder brother, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my friends is to give them first, but I have not been able to do it. The actions of a mediocre person are cautious; if there is something that is lacking, he dare not not try hard, and if there is something that is more than enough, he dare not use it all; if he speaks, he will act accordingly, and if he acts, he will act accordingly. Why does a gentleman not have to be frank!"
Gu Sikong did not know his name, so he went to see Prime Minister Wang. Prime Minister Xiao Ji was tired of it. Gu thought about why he had to ask for his advice, and said to his companions, "I have often heard that Yuan Gongdao assisted Zhongzong and protected Jiangbei. He was a little uneasy, which made people gasp." The Prime Minister realized this and said to Gu, "This boy is very smart and sharp."
Gu Changkang bites the sugarcane, first eats the tail, asks why, cloud: "Gradually to the best."
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