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When Shi Daizhong died, he had no son, but six concubines. He asked for the successor. He said: "Bathing and wearing jade are omens." All five of them bathed and wore jade; Shi Qizi asked: "Who bathes and wears jade when mourning a parent?" No bathing or jade. Shi Qizi said.
Someone looked at the tomb of Yang Hu's father, and he would become the emperor in the future. Hu disliked his words, so he dug up the back of the tomb to destroy its power. The fortune teller stood there and said, "He should be promoted to the third highest official because of a broken arm." Suddenly, Hu fell off his horse and broke his arm, and he was indeed promoted to the highest official.
It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. ” He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.
Duke Dai went out from the east, and Taifu Xie went to see him. Xie Ben wore it lightly, and only met him to discuss musical instrument and books. Dai was not stingy and his discussion of the zither and calligraphy became even better. Xie Youran knew his capacity.
Duke Huan was reading the Biography of Eminent Men, and when he came to Ling Zhongzi, he threw it away and said, "Who can carve this stream and live in it?"
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
A gentleman is one who is well-informed, strong in knowledge, and humble, and who is kind and not lazy. A gentleman does not exhaust people's favors or exhaust people's loyalty, but maintains friendship.
Pang Shiyuan of Nanjun heard that Sima Decao was in Yingchuan, so he traveled 2,000 miles to wait for him. When they arrived, they met Decao picking mulberry leaves. Shi Yuan said to him from inside the carriage, "I heard that a man should wear gold and purple when dealing with the world. How can he bend the flood and hold the silk women's affairs?" Decao said, "Get off the carriage for now. You know how to quickly go astray, and don't worry about losing your way. In the past, Bo Cheng worked in the fields with his wife, and did not envy the glory of the princes; Yuan Xian worked in the mulberry field, and was not interested in the official house. How can one sit in a luxurious house, ride a fat horse, and have dozens of maids, and then be extraordinary? This is why Xu and Fu were generous, and why Yi and Qi sighed for a long time. Even if one had stolen the title of Qin and had a wealth of thousands of horses, it would not be valuable enough!" Shi Yuan said, "I was born in a remote area, and I have rarely seen great principles. If you don't strike the loud bell or beat the thunder drum, you won't know their sound."
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