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Xie Youyu said: "My friend Wang Meizi is clear and fluent, Ji Yanzu is broad-minded, elegant and profound, and Dong Zhongdao is outstanding and well-mannered."
Shooting is the way of benevolence. When shooting, you should seek to correct yourself. After you have corrected yourself, you can shoot. If you shoot and miss, you should not blame the one who beat you, but look for the reason in yourself. Confucius said: "A gentleman has nothing to contend with, so he must shoot! He bows and yields before ascending, and drinks after bowing. His contest is that of a gentleman."
To congratulate a man on marrying, he said: "So-and-so made me know that you have a guest, which made me ashamed."
Whenever Xi Chao heard that someone wanted to retire to a noble place, he would raise funds worth millions for them and build them a residence. He built a house for Dai Gong in Shan, which was very fine. Dai Shi went to his old residence and wrote to his relatives, saying, "I have just arrived in Shan and it is like an official residence." Xi also arranged for Fu to raise funds of one million yuan, but Fu was busy with some secret matters and therefore he was not left behind.
Taishu Guang was very eloquent, and Zhi Zhongzhi was good at calligraphy, and both of them became ministers. Whenever he sat down with the Duke, they would talk extensively, but Zhongzhi could not respond. It is difficult to express my thoughts broadly if I retreat, and I cannot answer if I express my thoughts broadly.
Emperor Wu of Jin asked Sun Hao, "I heard that people in the south like to compose songs like 'You'. Can you compose it?" Hao was drinking, so he raised his cup to persuade the emperor and said, "I was your neighbor in the past, and now I am your subject. I'll give you a cup of wine, and may you live forever." The emperor regretted it.
When Gu Rong was in Luoyang, he once accepted someone's invitation. He noticed that the person who was roasting meat wanted to be roasted too, so he stopped what he was doing. Those sitting together laughed at him. Rong said, "How can one hold it all day long and not know its taste?" Later, when he encountered chaos and had to cross the river, every time he was in danger, there was always one person by his side. When he asked him why, he found out that he was the one who was being burned.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
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