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When marrying a woman to the emperor, it is said to prepare the people; to the king, it is said to prepare wine and liquor; to the minister, it is said to prepare sweeping.
When Lezheng Zichun's mother died, he did not eat for five days. He said, "I regret it. Since my mother didn't know my feelings, how can I use my feelings!"
Liu Wan'an is Daozhen's nephew. What Yu Gong called "bright as jade". It is also said: "A thousand people can see it, and a hundred people can see it."
When Wei Xima was about to cross the river, he looked miserable and said to his attendants, "Seeing this vast expanse of land, I feel overwhelmed with emotions. If I still have feelings, who can stop me from feeling this way?"
A gentleman is usually reserved. A gentleman is ashamed to prepare funeral supplies. A gentleman will not do anything that can be prepared in one or two days. In mourning clothes, the sons of brothers are treated as sons, and they should be welcomed and brought forward; the sisters-in-law and uncles have no mourning clothes, and they should be pushed away; the sisters-in-law and sisters are thin, and some people accept me and treat them well. Eating beside a mourning person, I have never been full.
Yu Xiao once went out on an expedition to the west and has not returned yet. The woman's mother, Ruan, was Liu Wan'an's wife. She and her daughter went up to the city tower of Anling. Soon Yi returned, riding a fine horse and accompanied by a magnificent carriage. Ruan said to his daughter, "I heard that Yu Lang can ride, how could I meet him?" The woman told Yi, and Yi then opened the procession and rode his horse in the road. After two turns, he fell off his horse to the ground, but he looked calm.
When Kong Wenju was ten years old, he went to Luo with his father. At that time, Li Yuanli was famous and served as the Inspector of the Capital Region. Only those with outstanding talents and reputation, as well as those who were his cousins, were allowed to visit him. When Wen Ju arrived at the gate, he said to the clerk, "I am the relative of Lord Li." After being let in, he sat down in front. Yuanli asked, "What is the relationship between you and me?" He replied, "In the past, my ancestor Confucius and your ancestor Boyang had a teacher-student relationship. So you and I have been friends for generations." Yuanli and the guests were all surprised. When Taizhong Daifu Chen Wei arrived later, people told him the same words. Wei said, 鈥淎 child who is very smart when he is young may not be a good person when he grows up!鈥 Wen Ju said, 鈥淚 think you must have been very smart when you were young!鈥 Wei was very embarrassed.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
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