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When Zhao's mother married her daughter off, she warned her daughter before she left, "Be careful not to do good things!" The daughter said, "If I can't do good things, can I do evil things?" The mother said, "If I can't do good things, how can I do evil things?"
A gentleman is usually reserved. A gentleman is ashamed to prepare funeral supplies. A gentleman will not do anything that can be prepared in one or two days. In mourning clothes, the sons of brothers are treated as sons, and they should be welcomed and brought forward; the sisters-in-law and uncles have no mourning clothes, and they should be pushed away; the sisters-in-law and sisters are thin, and some people accept me and treat them well. Eating beside a mourning person, I have never been full.
Confucius said, "When the princes marry the emperor, they must announce it to the ancestors and offer sacrifices to the gods. They wear the crown and go out to attend the court, and order the priest to announce it to the gods, the ancestral temples, the mountains and rivers. Then they order the five officials of the state to go out and leave on the road. The announcement should be made every five days. If it is more than that, it is not polite. Whenever an announcement is made, sacrificial offerings should be used. The return is the same. When the princes meet, they must announce it to the gods, and wear court clothes and go out to attend the court. Order the priests to report to the mountains and rivers passing by the five temples. Also order the five officials of the state to go out on the road. On the way back, they must personally report to the ancestors. Then order the priests to report to what has been reported before, and then listen to the court and enter.
Xun Ciming met Yuan Lang of Runan and asked about the people of Yingchuan. Ciming mentioned his brothers first. Lang laughed and said, "Can a scholar be selected only because of his kinship?" Ciming said, "You are questioning me, what scripture are you basing your opinion on?" Lang said, "I was just asking about the country's scholars, but you mentioned my brothers, so I blame them." Ciming said, "In the past, Qi Xi recommended people from within the country without missing their sons, and recommended people from outside the country without missing their enemies, which was considered to be very fair. The poem of King Wen of Gongdan did not discuss the virtues of Yao and Shun, but praised Wen and Wu, which is the meaning of loving one's relatives. The meaning of the Spring and Autumn Annals is to include one's country within and exclude other countries. Moreover, if one does not love one's relatives but loves others, is it not against virtue?"
When serving food to elders, if the host serves the food personally, then one should bow before eating; if the host does not serve the food personally, then one should eat without bowing.
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