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Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
When Ruan Guanglu was in Shan, he had a good car and he lent it to everyone who asked for it. Someone wanted to borrow money to bury his mother but did not dare to ask. When Queen Ruan heard this, she sighed and said, "I have a carriage but people are afraid to lend it to me. What's the use of the carriage?" Then she burned it.
The Master said: "Everyone says I know, but they are driven into the traps and snares, and no one knows how to avoid them. Everyone says I know, but they choose the moderate, but they cannot keep it for a month."
Ji, Ruan, Shan and Liu were drinking in the bamboo forest, and Wang Rong came later. The infantryman said, "The vulgar people have come to defeat us again!" The king laughed and said, "Can your intentions also be defeated?"
When Cao Gong was young, he met Qiao Xuan, who said to him, "The world is in turmoil, with heroes fighting each other. Wouldn't you be the one to sort things out? But you are a hero in troubled times and a villain in peaceful times. I regret that I am old and cannot see you become rich and powerful. I will be a burden to my descendants."
In the funeral of a king, if there is no small burial, he will leave as a guest of the duke; in the funeral of an official, if there is no small burial, he will leave at the order of the king; in the funeral of a scholar, he will leave without burial for an official. Whenever the host leaves, he goes barefoot, with his hem tied to his waist and his heart beat, and descends from the west steps. The king bows to the guest of state and the minister of honor at his seat; the minister, at the king's order, meets him outside the bedroom door; the messenger goes up to the hall to tell the death, and the host bows below; the scholar cries with the minister in person; he does not go against the door, the lady goes out for the lady of the king, the lady goes out for the lady's order, and the scholar's wife should not be buried, so the lady goes out.
Therefore, "The Book of Songs" says: "The great-grandson of the marquis family, the four correct ones are all raised; the great officials and the gentlemen, all the common people, small and big, are in the king's place, and they are entertained and arched, and then they are praised." It means that the ruler and the ministers devote their efforts to archery to learn rituals and music, and then they are safe and praised. Therefore, the emperor regulates it, and the princes are responsible for it. This is why the emperor supports the princes, and the soldiers are not used, and the princes are the tools for correcting themselves.
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