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The emperor's wife is called the queen, the princes are called the lady, the great officials are called the young lady, the scholars are called the woman, and the common people are called the wife.
When Xi Jiabin died, his wife's brothers wanted to bring their sister back, but she refused to come. He said: "Even if I cannot live in the same room with Xi Lang, I would rather not be buried in the same grave with him after death!"
Yu Zisong's poem He Qiao said: "They are as dense as thousand-foot-high pines. Although they are piled up, they have branches. If they are placed in a building, they can serve as pillars."
When Su Jun arrived at Shitou, all the officials fled and only the attendant Zhong Ya stayed by the emperor's side. Someone said to Zhong, "Advance when you see an opportunity and retreat when you see difficulty. This is the ancient way. Your Majesty is bright and upright, so he will not be tolerated by the enemy. Why don't you take advantage of the situation instead of waiting for the consequences?" Zhong said, "I can't help the country when it is in chaos and I can't save the king when he is in danger. If we all retreat and try to save ourselves, I'm afraid Dong Hu will take the tablet and advance!"
When the meal is finished, the guest kneels in front and finishes the meal and gives it to the prime minister. The host stands up and says goodbye to the guest, and then the guest sits down. When serving drinks to elders, one must stand up when the wine is served and bow to receive it. The elder said goodbye, and the younger one returned to the table and drank. The elders raised the wine but it was not brewed yet, and the younger ones dared not drink. When elders give gifts, the young and the humble dare not refuse. When fruit is given to the king, those who have seeds should keep the seeds in their pockets. When I serve food to the king, and the king gives me other things, the parts of the vessels that are used to irrigate them do not need to be written, but the rest should be written.
The Book of Songs says: "When wearing brocade, one should still wear a plain cloth." This is because it is disliked that the pattern is conspicuous. Therefore, the way of a gentleman is to be obscure but brighter day by day; the way of a villain is to be clear but disappear day by day. The way of a gentleman is to be indifferent but not disgusting, to be simple but elegant, to be warm but reasonable, to know the nearness of the far, to know the direction of the wind, to know the obviousness of the subtle, and to be able to enter virtue. The Book of Songs says: "Although he is hidden, he is also as bright as Confucius!" Therefore, a gentleman is not guilty when he examines himself, and has no evil in his ambition. What a gentleman cannot reach is what people cannot see! The Book of Songs says: "Even if the prime minister is in your room, he is not ashamed of the leaking roof." Therefore, a gentleman is respectful without moving, and trustworthy without speaking. The Book of Songs says: "When he reports a favor, he does not speak, and there is no dispute at the time." Therefore, a gentleman does not reward, but the people are encouraged, and does not get angry, but the people are as powerful as a sword. The Book of Songs says: "Don't show your virtue! The hundred officials will punish you." Therefore, a gentleman is sincere and respectful, and the world is peaceful. The Book of Songs says: "I have a clear mind, and I do not make loud noises or use color." Confucius said: "Sounds and colors are the least important in transforming the people." The Book of Songs says: "Virtue is like a hair." Even a hair has its own rules. The heaven's carriage is soundless and odorless, it is the ultimate!
The Master said: “A ruler of a country should make clear what is good and what is bad, so as to show the people kindness, and then the people will not be double-minded. The Book of Songs says: ‘Be calm and share your position, and be good at being upright. ’” The Master said: “If the superior is suspicious, the people will be confused; if the subordinate is difficult to know, the ruler will be overworked. Therefore, a ruler who governs the people should make clear what is good to show the people, be careful of what is bad to prevent the people from being licentious, and then the people will not be confused. The ministers should follow the manners, not be heavy-handed, not support what they cannot do, and not bother what they do not know, and then the ruler will not be overworked. The Book of Songs says: ‘The God is strict, and the people are at peace. ’ The Xiaoya says: ‘It is not that they only share, but that the king is in harmony. ’”
Zixia asked the Master, "Live in the funeral of your mother and wife." "Live, talk, eat and drink."
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