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The so-called self-cultivation is to regulate one's family. One should avoid what one loves, avoid what one despises, avoid what one fears, avoid what one pities, and avoid what one is lazy about. Therefore, there are few people in the world who know the evil of what one likes and the beauty of what one hates. Therefore, there is a proverb: "No one knows the evil of his son, and no one knows the greatness of his seedling. "This means that if you do not cultivate yourself, you cannot manage your family.
In mourning, one should only look at the deceased but not answer; in mourning of the same age, one should answer but not speak; in mourning of the great merit, one should speak but not discuss; in mourning of the minor merit, one should discuss but not enjoy music. This is the expression of grief in speech.
Hua Xin treated his sons and daughters very strictly. Even in a quiet room, he was as strict as if they were in the court. The brothers Chen Yuanfang indulged in tenderness and love, and the two families did not deviate from the track of Yongxi.
In this month, the day is short. Yin and Yang are in conflict, and all living things are disturbed. Gentlemen should be vigilant and cover their bodies when they go. If you want to be at peace, you should avoid noise and sex, and restrain your desires. You should be at peace with your body and quiet in your affairs, waiting for the yin and yang to settle. The weeds begin to grow, the lychees emerge, the earthworms knot, the elk horns fall off, and the springs stir. When the day is short, you should cut down trees and take bamboo arrows.
The meaning of the crown: The crown is made of black cloth. In ancient times, the cloth was black, and the Qi people wore it. As for its tassel, Confucius said: "I have never heard of it. It is better to wear it in a worn-out state." The son wears the crown on the east side to show his generation. The offering in the guest position is to add to the success. The three additions are more respected, which means his aspirations. The crown and the name are to respect the name. The appearance of the crown is the way of Zhou. The Zhangfu is the way of Yin. No pursuit is the way of the Xiahou clan. Zhou Bian, Yin Bian, Xia Shou. The three kings shared the leather cap and white pile. There is no ceremony for the crown of the senior officials, but there is a ceremony for their wedding. In ancient times, people were promoted to the rank of nobility after the age of fifty, so why did the crown ceremony of the senior officials exist? The crown ceremony of the princes was not invented until the end of the Xia Dynasty. The first son of the emperor is a scholar. There is no one in the world who is noble at birth. To establish the princes in succession is to show the virtue. To give people official titles is to kill virtue. To give posthumous titles after death is the present; in ancient times, there was no title when alive and no posthumous title when dead. What is respected in ritual is to respect its meaning. If it loses its meaning, it is the job of the historian to explain its number. Therefore, the number can be explained, but its meaning is difficult to know. Knowing its meaning and respecting it is the way for the emperor to rule the world.
If you have worn a three-year-old white cap, you can replace it with the hemp of great merit; only the walking stick and shoes cannot be changed. When there is a death of parents, the merit is reduced, and when you are with your brother, you can wear a white cap. When you are with your brother, you are called Yang Tong Mou Fu, without a name, and it is a god. When you live separately, when you first hear about your brother's death, you can only cry in response. When you first wear hemp, you can wear a mourning belt. If you go to the funeral without wearing hemp, and the host has not yet worn mourning, you should wear it with the host if you are distant, and wear it with the host if you are close. , and the number of days of wearing the hemp belt and mourning clothes. When the master's concubine dies, the son shall be in charge of everything from mourning clothes to the linen auspicious ceremony. The funeral and sacrifice shall not be held in the main wife. The master shall not care for the servant concubine. When the queen dies, the concubine shall wear the party clothes of the queen. If the queen takes over, the concubine shall not wear the party clothes of the previous queen.
When Kong Junping was seriously ill, Yu Sikong was sent to Kuaiji to visit him. He asked him about his condition and even shed tears. After Yu got off the bed, Kong said with a sigh: "A real man is about to die, but instead of asking about the way to keep the country and the family safe, he pretends to be a child and asks!" When Yu heard this, he thanked him and asked him to talk.
Wen Gong mourned his wife, from his aunt Liu family, the family value is chaotic and separated, only a daughter, very beautiful, aunt to be a subordinate to find marriage, the public secretly has the intention of self-marriage, answer Yun: "Good son-in-law is rare, but such as Yu Bi Yun what?" Report Gu Yun: "Has found a wedding place, the door is rough, the son-in-law is famous eunuch, all not reduced." Because the jade mirror stand a piece, the wedding, the girl with her hand covered with a silk fan, stroking her palms laughed and said: "I suspect it is an old slave, if it is like this!"
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