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A gentleman is one who is well-informed, strong in knowledge, and humble, and who is kind and not lazy. A gentleman does not exhaust people's favors or exhaust people's loyalty, but maintains friendship.
The way to display the utensils is to display more and then accept them sparingly; to display sparingly and accept them all is fine. When rushing to the funeral of a brother, first go to the tomb and then the family, and cry for the position. For the funeral of someone you know, cry in the palace and then the tomb. A father shall not be the son of many sons and the outsiders shall be the next. Brothers with princes shall be beheaded. For minor mourning, the belt, hemp and linen shall not be cut off, and the woman shall return to repay the loss.
Emperor Xiaowu was very close to and respectful of Wang Guobao and Wang Ya. Ya recommended Wang Xun to the emperor, and the emperor wanted to meet him. Once at night, when he was talking with Guo Bao and Ya, the emperor felt a little drunk and lustful, so he ordered Xun to be called. When he was about to arrive, he heard the soldiers' message. Guo Bao knew that he was inferior to Wang Xun in talent and was afraid of losing his favor, so he said, "Wang Xun is a famous person today. Your Majesty should not see him with wine and women. You can issue another edict." The emperor agreed with his words and thought he was loyal, so he did not see Xun.
Wang Rong lost his son Wanzi. Shan Jian went to visit him, and the king was overwhelmed with grief. Jian said, "How could the thing in the child's arms be like this?" The king said, "The sages are oblivious to emotions, and the lowest among the poor are not even capable of emotions. Emotions are focused on people of our generation." Jian was convinced by his words and felt even more sad.
As a son: While parents are still alive, your clothes do not have to be purely plain. There is an orphan in the room, and his hat and clothes are not of pure color.
Lord Tao was seriously ill and did not offer any suggestion for a replacement, which the officials in the court thought was resentful. When King Injo heard this, he said, "There are no cunning people at this time, so I will not pass on Mr. Tao's words." The wise men of the time regarded it as a virtuous message.
When Xie Wan went on the northern expedition, he often whistled and sang to show off his superiority, and never tried to comfort his soldiers. Xie Gong loved Wan very much, but he knew that he would definitely fail, so he went with him. Congrong said to Wan: "You are the marshal, you should invite the generals to banquets more often to win their hearts." Wan followed his advice. He summoned all the generals, but none of them said anything. He just pointed at the four people sitting around him and said, "You are all strong soldiers." The generals were very angry. In order to express his gratitude and trust, Mr. Xie personally visited everyone from the captain of the army to the commander-in-chief and expressed his sincere gratitude. When everything went wrong, the army wanted to get rid of him. He then said, "I should become a hermit." So fortunately he was spared.
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