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In all the etiquette of servants, they must give the servants the reins. If the servant is of a lower rank, then accept it; otherwise, then refuse. If the servant is of a lower rank, then stroke the servant's hand; otherwise, then hold him down. The carriage of guests does not enter the main gate. Women do not stand up to ride. Dogs and horses do not enter the hall. Therefore, gentlemen should wear yellow hair, lower than the rank of ministers, do not gallop when entering the country, and must bow when entering the village.
Those who follow others in mourning should not mourn until their parents are gone. Those who follow others should mourn even when their parents are dead. If a concubine leaves a female ruler, she should not mourn for the female ruler's son. According to etiquette, there is no sacrifice without the king. The crown prince does not lower his wife's parents; his wife is the same as the son of a senior official. If the father is a scholar and the son is the emperor or a prince, then sacrifices are made to the emperor or a prince, and his body is dressed in scholar's clothes. If the father is the emperor or a prince and the son is a scholar, sacrifices are made to the scholar, and his body is dressed in scholar's clothes. If a woman leaves the house when she is in mourning, she should be removed. If she leaves the house before mourning for her parents, she should be mourned for three years. If she leaves the house after mourning, it is over. If she returns without mourning, she should be mourned for a period of time; if she returns after mourning, she should be mourned for a period of time.
Huan Cheqi is not good at picking up new clothes. After bathing, the woman gave him new clothes. The cavalry was furious and urged them to take him away. The woman brought it back and said, "The clothes are not new, so how can they be old?" Duke Huan laughed and chopped it off.
Le Ling's daughter married General Wang Ying of Chengdu. The king's brother, the King of Changsha, held power in Luo, and they began to plot against each other. The King of Changsha is close to villains and stays away from gentlemen. Everyone in the court is afraid of danger. After Le magistrate had agreed to the emperor's wishes and had relatives in marriage, a group of petty people started to slander him in Changsha. Changsha once asked Le Ling, who looked calm and answered slowly, "Why would you exchange five sons for one daughter?" From then on, he felt relieved and had no more doubts.
When a senior official came to pay his respects, he would say no. When paying respects to someone, he should not be happy on that day. Women should not go beyond the border to pay respects to someone. On the day of paying respects, they should not drink alcohol or eat meat. When paying respects to a funeral, the person must hold the lead. If they follow the coffin to the grave, they should all hold the rope. When a public official pays respects, there must be someone to bow, even if they are friends or people from the state or village. When paying respects, he should say, "My lord will serve you." The host should say, "Come." When the lord sees the coffin on the road, he must send someone to pay his respects. When a senior official is buried, commoners should not receive his respects. If the brother of the wife's father dies, the son should be the main one, and he should not cry or jump. The husband should enter the room on the right, and have someone stand outside the door to inform the visitors. If they are close to him, he should go in and cry. If the father is alive, he should cry in the wife's room; if they are not the father's descendants, he should cry in other rooms. If there is a funeral, if you hear of the death of a distant brother, you should cry in the side room; if there is no side room, you should cry on the right side of the door; if they are from the same country, you should go to cry.
When Xu Yuan was young, people compared him to Wang Gouzi, which made Xu very upset. At that time, many people and Master Yu were giving lectures at the West Temple in Kuaiji, and the king was also there. Xu Yi was very angry, so he went to the West Temple to discuss the pros and cons with Wang. The king was deeply humiliated after being so frustrated. Xu Fu held Wang's position, and Wang held Xu's position, and they exchanged letters with each other; Wang was again submissive. Xu said to Master Zhi: "What did your disciple say just now?" Zhi said calmly: "Your words are good, but why do you have to be so bitter? This is not a talk about seeking the truth!"
When marrying a wife, one should not marry someone with the same surname as her. Therefore, if one buys a concubine but does not know her surname, one should consult the divination. If a widow's son has no opinion on him, he should not be friends with him.
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