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When Gu Rong was in Luoyang, he once accepted someone's invitation. He noticed that the person who was roasting meat wanted to be roasted too, so he stopped what he was doing. Those sitting together laughed at him. Rong said, "How can one hold it all day long and not know its taste?" Later, when he encountered chaos and had to cross the river, every time he was in danger, there was always one person by his side. When he asked him why, he found out that he was the one who was being burned.
The gentleman said: "Gently accept harmony, and accept white; loyal and faithful people can learn etiquette. If there is no loyal and faithful person, etiquette will not be in vain. Therefore, it is precious to get the right person. Confucius said: "Reciting three hundred poems in the Book of Songs is not enough for one offering. The ceremony of one offering is not enough for a great feast. The ceremony of a great feast is not enough for a great group. The great group is ready, but it is not enough for the feast of the emperor." Don't discuss etiquette lightly! Zilu was the chief of Ji's family. Ji's family offered sacrifices at dusk, and when the day was not enough, they continued with candles. Even if there is a strong face and a solemn and respectful heart, they are all tired. The officials limped and leaned to attend the sacrifice, which was a great disrespect. On other days when offering sacrifices, Zilu would be present. The affairs of the inner room would be handled at the door, and the affairs of the hall would be handled at the steps. They would start their activities at dawn and leave at dusk. Confucius heard this and said, "Who says that You doesn't know etiquette?
Zhu Fashen was sitting next to Jianwen. Liu Yin asked, "Why does a Taoist visit rich families?" He replied, "You can see the rich families yourself. I, a poor Taoist, am like visiting a thatched cottage." Some people said it was Bian Ling.
Liu Zhenchang and Wang Zhongzu traveled together, and it was late in the day without any food. An acquaintance invited him to dinner, the food was very sumptuous, but he declined it. Zhong Zu said, "It's just to fill my void, why bother to refuse?" Zhen Chang said, "You can't be friends with villains."
銆銆When Fan Xuan was eight years old, he was picking vegetables in the back garden and accidentally injured his finger and started crying loudly. Someone asked, "Are you in pain?" He replied, "It's not pain, I just dare not damage my body or hair, that's why I'm crying!" Xuan Jie was a frugal person, so when Han Yuzhang gave him a hundred pieces of silk, he refused to accept them. He reduced the amount by fifty pieces, but still refused to accept it. In this way, he reduced it by half, until it reached one horse, but he never accepted it again. The Queen of Han was riding in the same carriage with Fan. The Queen cut two feet of flesh in the carriage and gave it to Fan, saying, "Would anyone rather let his wife be without a scarf?" Fan laughed and accepted it.
Mr. Xi lived during the Yongjia Rebellion, and his hometown was very poor and hungry. The villagers praised his virtue and shared the feast with him. The Duke often brought his brother's son Mai and his aunt's two younger sons Zhou Yi to eat there. The villagers said, "We are all hungry and in need. Since you are a wise man, we want to help you. But we are afraid that we cannot save enough for both of us." So the Duke went to eat alone, and he always put rice on his cheeks and spit it out to his two children. Later they both survived and crossed the river together. After Duke Xi died, Yi was appointed as the county magistrate of Shan. After resigning from his post, he returned home and laid straw at the head of Duke Xi's bed, mourning for the whole three years.
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