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The meaning of the banquet etiquette of the princes: the king stands in the southeast of the steps to the east, facing the ministers to the south, and the ministers all move forward a little, which is the position; the king sits on the steps to the east, occupying the main position; the king stands alone on the seat, facing the west, and no one dares to approach him. It is the etiquette of setting up guests and drinking; letting the prime minister serve the host, and no minister dares to challenge the king in etiquette; not treating the ministers as guests, but the ministers as guests, is suspicious, which shows the meaning of suspicion; when the guests enter the central courtyard, the king lowers one level and bows to them, which is a courtesy.
The etiquette for being a son is: be warm in winter and cool in summer, be alert at dusk and check on others in the morning, and do not argue with the ugly and the barbaric.
Therefore, when a man is born, he uses a mulberry bow and a straw arrow to shoot at the four directions of heaven and earth. The four directions of heaven and earth are what a man should do. Therefore, he must first have aspirations for what he should do, and then dare to use grain. This is what it means to eat.
Someone asked, "Why do people bury their parents after three days of death?" The answer is: filial sons are sad and resentful when their parents die, so they crawl on the ground and cry, as if they will be resurrected, how can they be taken away and buried. Therefore, it is said that the funeral is held after three days, in order to wait for the body to be reborn. If the body is not reborn after three days, it is also dead. The filial son's heart will also be weakened; the family plan and clothing can also be completed; the distant relatives can also come. Therefore, the sages made a decision to set a three-day ritual system.
When Xie Wan went on the northern expedition, he often whistled and sang to show off his superiority, and never tried to comfort his soldiers. Xie Gong loved Wan very much, but he knew that he would definitely fail, so he went with him. Congrong said to Wan: "You are the marshal, you should invite the generals to banquets more often to win their hearts." Wan followed his advice. He summoned all the generals, but none of them said anything. He just pointed at the four people sitting around him and said, "You are all strong soldiers." The generals were very angry. In order to express his gratitude and trust, Mr. Xie personally visited everyone from the captain of the army to the commander-in-chief and expressed his sincere gratitude. When everything went wrong, the army wanted to get rid of him. He then said, "I should become a hermit." So fortunately he was spared.
When Ruan Bubing lost his mother, Pei Linggong went to offer condolences. Ruan Fang was drunk, sat on the bed with his hair loose, and did not cry. Pei arrived, sat on the ground, cried and mourned, and then left. Someone asked Pei, "In a condolence ceremony, the host cries and the guests perform the rituals. Since Ruan didn't cry, why did you cry?" Pei said, "Ruan is an outsider, so he doesn't respect rituals. We are ordinary people, so we take rituals as our own." People at that time sighed that he had achieved the best of both worlds.
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