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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
When Jin Jianwen was the governor of an army, the dust on the bed he sat on was so thick that he could not even hear the dust brushed away. He could see the footprints of a rat and thought it was a good thing. A military officer saw a rat walking in broad daylight and ordered it to be killed with a board in his hand. The governor was unhappy with this and his men rose up in protest. The teacher said: "I cannot forget the fact that I was harmed by rats. Now, is it wrong to use rats to harm people?"
Emperor Wen of Wei was jealous of his younger brother, Prince of Rencheng, because he was brave and strong. As they were playing Go and eating dates in the presence of Empress Dowager Bian, Emperor Wen put poison in the stems of the dates. He selected the edible ones and presented them to the king, but the king did not understand and mixed them with other foods. Since he was poisoned, the Queen Mother asked for water to save him. The emperor ordered his attendants to destroy the bottles and jars in advance, and the empress dowager ran barefoot to the well, but there was nothing to draw water from. After a while, he died. He wanted to kill Dong'e again, but the Queen Mother said, "You have killed my Rencheng, so you cannot kill my Dong'e again."
When Prime Minister Wang was appointed Sikong, Tingwei Huan had two buns on his head, a bun on his head, and a staff. He peeked at him from the roadside and sighed, "People say A'long is ahead, so A'long is ahead on his own." Before he knew it, he arrived at the gate of the palace.
Ziyun: "When a villain is poor, he is prudent; when rich, he is arrogant; when prudent, he steals; when arrogant, he is disorderly." Rites are rules and regulations based on human nature, which are used to censor the people. Therefore, the sages set rules for wealth and nobility so that the rich will not be arrogant, the poor will not be prudent, and the noble will not be dissatisfied with the superiors, so disorder will be eliminated. Ziyun: "If the poor love music, the rich love rites, and the people are peaceful, the world will be almost there. The Book of Songs says: 'People are greedy and disorderly, and would rather be poisoned. '" Therefore, it is stipulated that the country should not exceed a thousand chariots, the capital should not exceed a hundred chariots, and the family should not be rich. With this rule, the princes still rebel.
Xi Jiabin said to Xie Gong: "Although I did not kneel down to talk deeply, my thoughts were profound." He also said: "Youjun visited Jiabin." Jiabin heard it and said: "They cannot be called visits, but they can be called friends!" Xie Gong thought Jiabin's words were right.
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