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When consulting an elder, one must hold a stick and follow his lead. It is impolite to answer an elder's question without declining.
When Ruan Guanglu was in Shan, he had a good car and he lent it to everyone who asked for it. Someone wanted to borrow money to bury his mother but did not dare to ask. When Queen Ruan heard this, she sighed and said, "I have a carriage but people are afraid to lend it to me. What's the use of the carriage?" Then she burned it.
Zi SiWhen his mother died in Wei, Liu Ruo said to Zisi: "You are the descendant of a sage. People from all over the world come to you to observe the rites. You should be careful." Zisi said: "Why should I be careful? I heard that if there is the rite but not the money, a gentleman will not do it; if there is the rite and the money but not the time, a gentleman will not do it. Why should I be careful!"
Fu Qian was already well versed in the Spring and Autumn Annals and was about to write a note on it, wanting to refer to similarities and differences. He heard that Cui Lie had gathered his disciples to lecture on the Spring and Autumn Annals, so he hid his name and was hired out to Lie's disciples to work for a living. Whenever he was talking, he would eavesdrop on what was happening behind the door. Knowing that no one can surpass myself, I discuss my strengths and weaknesses with other students. Lie Wen was surprised and didn't know who he was, but he had heard of Qian's name and was suspicious of him. He went there early in the morning, and before he woke up, he called out, "Zi Shen! Zi Shen!" Qian was startled and responded, and they then became friends.
A gentleman is one who is well-informed, strong in knowledge, and humble, and who is kind and not lazy. A gentleman does not exhaust people's favors or exhaust people's loyalty, but maintains friendship.
Zhuge Hong was unwilling to learn when he was young. When he first talked with Wang Yifu, he already had extraordinary achievements. The king sighed and said, "You are an extremely talented person. If you study harder, you will have nothing to be ashamed of." Later, Hong read Zhuangzi and Laozi, and talked with Wang, and he was able to compete with them.
Family mourners do not worry about where to live, and ruins do not endanger their bodies. Famished people do not worry about where to live, because there is no temple; ruins do not endanger their bodies, because there is no offspring.
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