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Zixia said: "The five ultimates have been heard, and I dare to ask what the three nothings are?" Confucius said: "Music without sound, ritual without body, mourning without clothes, this is called the three nothings. "Zixia said: "I have heard the three "nothings" briefly. May I ask which poem is closest to them?" Confucius said: "'The life of the morning and the evening is to be forgiven and secret' is the music without sound. 'The dignity and manners are so great that they cannot be chosen' is the etiquette without form. 'When the people are in mourning, they crawl to save them' is the mourning without clothes."
The Duke said, “Why don’t gentlemen today practice this?” Confucius said, “Gentlemen today are insatiable in their love of goods, untiring in their indulgence of virtue, idle and arrogant, and are sure to destroy the people. They use the people at noon to attack those who have the Way; they seek what they want, not what they should. In the past, people were used from the front, but now people are used from the back. Gentlemen today do not practice etiquette.”
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
When Wang Xiaobo died, his head was hung on a big beam. Sima Taifu ordered his carriage to go out to the mark. When he saw the head of the enemy, he asked, "Why are you so anxious? Do you want to kill me?"
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Yang Dezuo was Wei Wu's chief clerk. At that time, he was building the Xiangguo Gate and had just begun to construct the rafters. Wei Wu came out to take a look and had someone write the word "活" on the door before leaving. When Yang saw it, he ordered it to be destroyed. After finishing, he said: "The word 'live' in the word 'door' means 'wide'. Wang Zheng thinks the door is too big."
Wang Shu was transferred to be the Minister of the Chancellery and was appointed as such when the matter was settled. Wendu said, "So I should yield to Du Xu." Lantian said, "Do you think I am capable of this?" Wendu said, "Why not? But being able to yield is a good thing, and I am afraid it should not be missed." Lantian said with emotion, "If you say you are capable, why should you yield? People say you are better than me, but you are definitely not as good as me."
When Wei Jie came to Xiadu from Yuzhang, people had heard of his name for a long time, and the crowds of people who came to see him were like a wall. Jie had a weak constitution before and his body could not bear the fatigue, so he fell ill and died. People at that time said, "Wei Jie was watched to death."
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