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《抖音成人版抖音》

Shangshu Wang Hui once visited Wang Youjun's wife and asked, "Do you feel bad about your eyes and ears?" She replied, "White hair and falling teeth belong to the body; as for the eyes and ears, they are related to the spirit, can they be separated from people?"

Xu Shizhong and Gu Sikong were both assistants to the prime minister. At that time, they had already been met, and there were no differences in their outings, banquets and gatherings. One night, they went to the prime minister's tent to play with each other. The two of them were so happy that the prime minister ordered them to sleep in his tent. When I looked back at dawn, I felt no joy. Xu went to bed and snored loudly. The Prime Minister looked at the guests and said, "It is hard to find a place to sleep here either."

Wang Hun was sitting with his wife, Mrs. Zhong, when they saw Wu Zi passing by the courtyard. Hun said to his wife happily, "It is a relief to have such a son." The wife laughed and said, "If I could be married to a soldier and have a son, it would be no less than this!"

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Witch

Zhuchuliu

When the king of the country died, he did not dare to receive condolences. In the middle of the outer clan room, facing south, the minor officials spread the mats, the business and the priest spread the quilt, and the scholars washed their hands on the north side of the plate. The body was moved to the coffin, and after the coffin was finished, the chief minister informed the sons, and Feng Zhi danced. The lady sat on the east side, Feng Zhi rose and danced. There are three things that scholars mourn for the emperor: they burn all night, and ride on people and walk on the road.

I am a martial god in the city

Shanhui

Confucius got up early, put his hands behind his back and dragged his stick, and swayed at the door, singing, "Is Mount Tai collapsing? Is the beam breaking? Is the philosopher withering?" After singing, he went in and sat in front of the door. Zigong heard it and said, "If Mount Tai collapses, where can I look up? If the beam breaks and the philosopher withers, where can I go? Master, I am afraid you will be ill." Then he hurried in. The Master said, "Ci! Why are you so late? The Xia emperor was buried on the east steps, which was like being in the east; the Yin people buried between the two pillars, which meant that they were flanked by the host and the guest; the Zhou people buried on the west steps, which was like being the guest. And I am a Yin person. Last night, I dreamed that I was sitting and lying between the two pillars. If a wise king does not rise, who in the world can respect me? I am about to die." He died after seven days of illness.

The past is sad

Zhongsun Haochu

Chu Taifu went south, Sun Changle saw it in the ship, and Liu Zhen long died, Sun slugged, because of sarcasm said: "People's clouds perish, the country is exhausted."

I am the Lord of the World

Sikou Xiangling

Taifu Xie and Wang Wendu went to see Xi Chao together, but as time went by and Wang had not yet arrived, he wanted to leave. Xie said: "Can't you bear it for a moment for your life?"

Art Trends

Xun Yufang

For a senior official or a concubine of a noble family, the king should make a large coffin; if he gives a gift to the concubine, he should make a small coffin. For a concubine of a noble family, the king should come after the funeral. For a scholar, he should go after the funeral; if he gives a gift to the concubine, he should make a large coffin. For a concubine of a noble family, the lady should make a large coffin; if he gives a gift to the concubine, she should make a small coffin. For all wives, she should make a gift to the concubine and make a large coffin. For a concubine of a senior official or scholar, the king should go after the funeral. When a senior official or scholar is buried, the king should send someone to warn him, and the host should prepare a solemn offering and wait outside the gate. When he sees the horse's head, he should enter the right first. The witch should stop outside the gate. The king should take over first, and the king should place food inside the gate. The witch should ascend the steps of the east first, and face south with his back to the wall. The king should ascend the throne of the east. Two junior officials should stand in front with spears, and two should stand behind. When the emissary enters, the host bows and kowtows. When the king says his words, he looks at the prayer and dances, and the host dances. The great official may offer the sacrifice. The scholar shall wait outside the door, and when ordered to offer the sacrifice, he shall do so. After the sacrifice, the host shall wait outside the door first, and the king shall leave, and the host shall see him off outside the door, bowing and kowtows. When the king asks about the illness of the great official three times, and if he is in the funeral, he shall go there three times; when the scholar is ill, he shall ask once, and if he is in the funeral, he shall go there once. When the king offers condolences, he shall put on the funeral clothes. When the lady offers condolences to the great official or scholar, the host shall meet her outside the door, see the horse's head, and enter the door to the right first. The lady enters, ascends the hall and takes the throne. The mistress descends from the west steps, bows and kowtows below. The lady looks at the crown prince and dances. Offering the sacrifice is the same as when the king arrives. When the lady leaves, the mistress sees her off inside the door, bows and kowtows; the host sees her off outside the gate without bowing. The great official and the king shall not meet him outside the door. Enter and take the throne at the bottom of the hall. The host faces north, and the other hosts face south; the woman takes the seat in the room. If there is a king's order, the husband and the wife shall follow the order, and the neighbors and guests, the king should bow after the host. When the king mourns, he should see the coffin and then dance. If the ministers and scholars go without the king's warning, they should not prepare a solemn offering; the king must offer an offering after he leaves.

Celestial Mobile

Xin Xiaoliu

When Liu Zhenchang first met Prime Minister Wang, it was a hot summer month. The Prime Minister used his belly to massage the chessboard and asked, "Why are you so tired?" After Liu left, someone asked, "What did you do when you met Lord Wang?" Liu said, "I didn't see anything unusual. I only heard him speak Wu dialect!"

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