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When Lady Xie was teaching her son, she asked the tutor, "How come I didn't see you teaching my son for the first time?" The tutor replied, "I always teach my son myself."
Wang Xu often slandered Yin Jingzhou to Wang Guobao, and Yin was very worried about it and sought advice from Wang Dongting. He said, "You just need to visit Wang Xu several times, and when you go there, send everyone away and discuss other matters. In this way, the friendship between the two kings will be broken." Yin followed his advice. When Guo Bao saw Wang Xu, he asked, "What did you talk about with Zhongkan in private?" Xu said, "We always keep in touch with each other and have nothing else to discuss." Guo Bao believed that Xu was hiding something from him, and indeed their friendship became less and less, and the slander stopped.
Fan Rongqi saw that Xi's super-vulgar feelings were not light, so he said, "Yi, Qi, Nest, Xu, Yiyi is famous. Why bother with the hard work of God and bitterness, and support Wuxie?"
The son-in-law, following the groom's orders, searches for the winner and selects four persons, including Ren You from among them. When he was a child, he was cute and adorable, and people at that time said that he had a good figure and a long shadow. Since crossing the river, I have lost my ambition. Prime Minister Wang asked Shixian to go to Shitou to welcome him first, and they treated him as usual. As soon as they saw each other, they felt something was wrong. After sitting down at the table, he drank and asked people, "Is this tea? Is it tea?" He felt it had a different color, so he explained, "I was asked just now whether it was hot or cold." He once walked down from the coffin and cried sadly. Upon hearing this, Prime Minister Wang said, "This is a sentimental fool."
When Wei Si Tu Jingzi died, Zixia offered condolences. The host had not yet buried him, so he went there in mourning clothes. Ziyou went to mourn. After the host had buried him, Ziyou came out, wearing mourning clothes and crying. Zixia asked, "Did you hear that?" He said, "I heard from you, Master, that if the host has not changed his clothes, he should not wear mourning clothes." Zengzi said, "Yanzi can be said to know etiquette, and he is respectful." Youruo said, "Yanzi wore the same fox fur coat for thirty years, and sent one carriage to the tomb and returned; the king had seven carriages, and the ministers had five carriages. How could Yanzi know etiquette?" Zengzi said, "If a country is not governed by the Way, a gentleman will be ashamed to be full of etiquette. If the state is extravagant, then show it frugality; if the state is frugal, then show it etiquette.
The Master said: "Listen carefully! The three women, I told you: there are still nine etiquettes, and four great feasts. If you know this, even if you do it in the fields, you will be a sage. When two kings meet, they bow and yield to each other before entering the door, and then they go up to the hall after bowing and yielding to each other, and then the music stops. They play Xiang and Wu, Xia and Yue in sequence. They set out their offerings, arrange their rituals and music, and prepare their hundreds of officials. Only in this way can a gentleman know benevolence. He follows the rules and returns to the rules, and he is in harmony with the phoenix. When a guest leaves, he is in harmony with the phoenix, and he is in harmony with the feathers. Therefore, a gentleman knows everything in etiquette. When he enters the door, the sound of gold is made to show his feelings. When he rises to sing Qingmiao, he is indebted to his virtue. When he goes down to play Xiang, he is indebted to his deeds. Therefore, the gentlemen of ancient times did not need to talk to each other in person, but only showed each other etiquette and music.
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