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When serving food to elders, if the host serves the food personally, then one should bow before eating; if the host does not serve the food personally, then one should eat without bowing.
The etiquette for being a son is: be warm in winter and cool in summer, be alert at dusk and check on others in the morning, and do not argue with the ugly and the barbaric.
When Deng You first sought refuge, he abandoned his own son on the road and saved his disciples. After crossing the river, he took a concubine and loved her very much. Many years later, when I asked him about the reason, I was told that he was a northerner who had suffered from rebellion. I remembered his parents' names and found out that he was You's nephew. You had always been a virtuous man with impeccable words and deeds. When he heard about this, he felt grief and resentment for the rest of his life and never kept a concubine again.
When He Pingshu's annotations to Laozi were completed, he presented them to Wang Fusi. When he saw Wang's annotations were exquisite and unique, he was amazed and said, "Such a person can discuss the relationship between heaven and man with me!" Therefore, he regarded his annotations as the Second Essay on Morality.
》 says: "Filial sons are not lacking." Confucius said: "To be harmonious with the party of parents can be called filial. Therefore, the gentleman uses harmony to unite the clan." The Book of Songs says: "This makes brothers more than enough; not to be so, brothers will be more friendly."
The guests went to Chen Taiqiu to stay overnight, and Taiqiu asked Yuanfang and Jifang to cook. The guest was discussing with Taiqiu, and the two of them brought in fire, both of them were silent and eavesdropping. I forgot to use chopsticks and spatula when cooking, and the rice fell into the pot. Taiqiu asked, "Why don't you cook with steam?" Yuanfang and Jifang knelt down and said, "Your Excellency was talking with a guest, and we were eavesdropping. We forgot to bring chopsticks and a basket when cooking, and now the rice has become porridge." Taiqiu said, "Do you know anything about it?" They replied, "I just remember it." The two men spoke at the same time and took turns to talk, without losing anything. Taiqiu said: "In this case, just eating rice is enough, why do we need rice?"
When Xi Jiabin died, his attendants told Xi Gong that "his husband has passed away." Upon hearing this, Xi Gong was not sad, but said to his attendants, "We can tell you during the funeral." When Xi Gong went to the funeral, he was so sad that he almost died.
Xi Jiabin admired the Buddhist and Taoist An Dewen, and gave him a thousand hu of rice and wrote him letters with piles of paper, expressing his sincere intentions. Daoan answered directly: "It will waste rice." He felt even more annoyed by having to wait for it.
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