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As a son: While parents are still alive, your clothes do not have to be purely plain. There is an orphan in the room, and his hat and clothes are not of pure color.
When Shan Xia left Dongyang, Wang Changshi wrote to him to ask for Dongyang's help, saying: "You have inherited the harsh policies, so you can achieve peace and order."
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
In ancient times, the emperor established six palaces, three wives, nine concubines, twenty-seven wives, and eighty-one imperial wives to listen to the internal governance of the world and to show the obedience of women; therefore, the world was harmonious and the family was orderly. The emperor established six officials, three dukes, nine ministers, twenty-seven great officials, and eighty-one nobles to listen to the external governance of the world and to clarify the male education of the world; therefore, the country is governed when the outside is harmonious. Therefore, it is said: The emperor listens to male education, and the queen listens to female obedience; the emperor manages the yang way, and the queen manages the yin virtue; the emperor listens to external governance, and the queen listens to internal duties. Teaching obedience becomes a custom, the outside and the inside are harmonious, and the country is governed, this is called great virtue.
When Fan Xuan was eight years old, he was picking vegetables in the back garden and accidentally injured his finger and started crying loudly. Someone asked, "Are you in pain?" He replied, "It's not pain, I just dare not damage my body or hair, that's why I'm crying!" Xuan Jie was a frugal person, so when Han Yuzhang gave him a hundred pieces of silk, he refused to accept them. He reduced the amount by fifty pieces, but still refused to accept it. In this way, he reduced it by half, until it reached one horse, but he never accepted it again. The Queen of Han was riding in the same carriage with Fan. The Queen cut two feet of flesh in the carriage and gave it to Fan, saying, "Would anyone rather let his wife be without a scarf?" Fan laughed and accepted it.
The reason why the ancient kings ruled the world is five: valuing virtue, valuing nobility, valuing the elderly, respecting the elders, and loving the young. These five are the reason why the ancient kings ruled the world. Valuing virtue, why? Because it is close to the Tao. Valuing nobility is because it is close to the monarch. Valuing the elderly is because it is close to relatives. Respecting the elders is because it is close to brothers. Loving the young is because it is close to children. Therefore, the most filial is close to the king, and the most brotherly is close to the hegemon. The most filial is close to the king, even if it is the emperor, there must be a father; the most brotherly is close to the hegemon, even if it is a prince, there must be a brother. The teachings of the ancient kings are followed and not changed, so they can lead the world and the country. Confucius said: "To establish love from one's relatives is to teach people to be harmonious. To establish education from one's elders is to teach people to be obedient. Teach people to be kind and harmonious, and people will value being close to one's relatives; teach people to respect elders, and people will value being obedient. Filial piety to parents, obedience to orders, and this is practiced throughout the world."
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