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When Guo Zhaozi's mother died, he asked Zi Zhang, "At the funeral and tomb, what positions should men and women take?" Zi Zhang said, "At the funeral of Si Tu Jingzi, Confucius was the prime minister, and men faced west and women faced east." He said, "Ah! No." He said, "At my funeral, Si was involved. You are responsible for it, the guests are guests, the host is the host--women and men all face west."
Whenever Huan Ziye heard a beautiful song, he would always cry out, "What can I do?" When Xie Gong heard this, he said, "Ziye is truly a man of deep affection."
Xi: Xiaoqing is next to Shangqing, Dafu is next to Xiaoqing, and Shi and Shuzi are next to them. When offering to the monarch, the monarch offers a travel reward; then offers to the minister, the minister offers a travel reward; then offers to the Dafu, the Dafu offers a travel reward; then offers to the Shi, the Shi offers a travel reward; then offers to the Shuzi. Zuodou, Sheng
If the eldest son is given a stick, his son will not take the position with the stick. For a wife, if the parents are alive, do not use a stick, do not bow the head. If the mother is alive, do not bow the head. Bowing the head means bowing in the gift. If you disobey the senior official of the princes, you will not return to wear clothes.
When a son serves his parents: if he advises them three times but they still don’t listen, he should cry and follow them. When the king is ill and takes medicine, the minister should taste it first. When a parent is ill and takes medicine, the son should taste it first.
At the funeral of Sikou Huizi, Ziyou prepared hemp mourning clothes and hemp sash for him. Wen Zi declined, saying, "You are insulted to be with Mi Mou's brother You, and you are insulted to wear clothes for him. How dare you decline?" Ziyou said, "It is the rite." Wen Zi retreated and cried again. Ziyou hurried to the seats of the ministers. Wen Zi declined again, saying, "You are insulted to be with Mi Mou's brother You, and you are insulted to wear clothes for him, and you are insulted to attend his funeral. How dare you decline?" Ziyou said, "I insist on asking." Wen Zi retreated, helped Shi Zi to stand facing south, and said, "You are insulted to be with Mi Mou's brother You, and you are insulted to wear clothes for him, and you are insulted to attend his funeral. How dare you not return to your position?" Ziyou hurried to the guest seat. At the funeral of General Wenzi, after the mourning period was over, the people of Yue came to offer their condolences. The host wore a deep robe and a white cap, waited in the temple, weeping. Ziyou looked at him and said, "General Wen's son is almost a commoner! He is a man of honor who died according to the etiquette, and his actions are in the right place."
When Du Qiao's mother died, there was no one in the palace, thinking it was a traitor. Confucius said, "When she died, she wore lamb fur and black hat, just change it." The Confucius did not mourn for lamb fur and black hat.
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