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. When parents grow old, they should not change their ways and should not be late. When parents are sick and look pale, this is the filial son's indifference. When a father dies and one cannot read his books, the traces of his hand remain; when a mother dies and one cannot drink from the cup, the traces of her mouth remain.
When a girl is betrothed, she is given a tassel; unless there is a serious reason, she will not enter the bride's house. When aunts, sisters, and daughters return home after getting married, brothers should not sit at the same table with them, nor eat from the same utensils with them. Father and son sit at different tables.
In ancient times, the seams of the hat were shrunk, but now, the seams are horizontal; so the hat of mourning is auspicious, which is not the ancient way. Zengzi said to Zisi: "Ji! When I was in mourning for my parents, I did not drink water for seven days." Zisi said: "The ancient kings established the rituals, those who passed by should bow down to reach it, and those who did not reach it should stand on tiptoe to reach it. Therefore, when a gentleman is in mourning for his parents, he should not drink water for three days, and he can only stand up after being caned." Zengzi said: "If small merits are not taxed, then distant brothers will never mourn, is that right?"
Wang Youjun was good at calligraphy, as were Wang Jingren and Xu Xuandu. After the two men died, Youjun became even more successful in debates. Kong Yan warned him, saying, "Your Excellency, in the past you had close relations with Wang and Xu. But after they passed away, you did not take good care of them. This is unacceptable to the people." Youjun felt very ashamed.
When Zigong asked about mourning, Confucius said, "Respect is the best, grief is the next, and thinness is the worst. The color of the face reflects the feelings; the sorrowful expression reflects the clothes." When asked about the mourning of brothers, Confucius said, "The mourning of brothers is recorded in the books and strategies. "A gentleman does not take away the mourning of others, nor should he take away his own mourning. Confucius said: "Shaolian and Dalian are good at mourning. They do not get tired for three days and do not stop for three months. They are sad for a long time and worried for three years. They are the sons of Dongyi. ”
Yuan Boyan finished writing biographies of famous scholars and met Xie Gong. The Duke laughed and said, "I once told you about the affairs of Jiangbei, but I just pretended to be cunning! Yanbo then wrote it down with chopsticks."
Sun Zijing took off her wife's mourning clothes and composed a poem to show Wang Wuzi. Wang said: "I don't know that literature is born from emotion and emotion is born from literature. Reading this makes me sad and increases the love between husband and wife."
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