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Wei Junchang was the chief secretary of Duke Wen, and Duke Wen liked him very much. They would always bring wine and dried meat to Wei, and sit cross-legged facing each other all day long. When Wei went to Wen and Xu, it was the same.
When a son serves his parents: if he advises them three times but they still don’t listen, he should cry and follow them. When the king is ill and takes medicine, the minister should taste it first. When a parent is ill and takes medicine, the son should taste it first.
To think about the constitution and seek the good is enough to be famous, but not enough to move the masses; to follow the virtuous and understand the distant is enough to move the masses, but not enough to transform the people. If a gentleman wants to transform the people and establish customs, he must learn!
Huan Xuanwu was not very understanding in talking to Emperor Jianwen. After deposing Haixi, he should explain himself, so he wrote several hundred words in advance to explain his intention to depose and establish the throne. When he saw Jianwen, he burst into tears for dozens of lines. Xuanwu was so ashamed that he could not say a word.
When a senior official came to pay his respects, he would say no. When paying respects to someone, he should not be happy on that day. Women should not go beyond the border to pay respects to someone. On the day of paying respects, they should not drink alcohol or eat meat. When paying respects to a funeral, the person must hold the lead. If they follow the coffin to the grave, they should all hold the rope. When a public official pays respects, there must be someone to bow, even if they are friends or people from the state or village. When paying respects, he should say, "My lord will serve you." The host should say, "Come." When the lord sees the coffin on the road, he must send someone to pay his respects. When a senior official is buried, commoners should not receive his respects. If the brother of the wife's father dies, the son should be the main one, and he should not cry or jump. The husband should enter the room on the right, and have someone stand outside the door to inform the visitors. If they are close to him, he should go in and cry. If the father is alive, he should cry in the wife's room; if they are not the father's descendants, he should cry in other rooms. If there is a funeral, if you hear of the death of a distant brother, you should cry in the side room; if there is no side room, you should cry on the right side of the door; if they are from the same country, you should go to cry.
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