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When a girl is betrothed, she is given a tassel; unless there is a serious reason, she will not enter the bride's house. When aunts, sisters, and daughters return home after getting married, brothers should not sit at the same table with them, nor eat from the same utensils with them. Father and son sit at different tables.
Huannan County and Yin Jingzhou said the second, because they jointly made a speech Sword head cook. "Yin said: "100-year-old man climbs withered branches." Gu said: "The well on the wheel is lying on the baby."
Duke Xian of Wei fled and returned to Wei. When he reached the suburbs, he was about to arrange the city with his followers before entering. Liuzhuang said, "If everyone guards the altar of the state, who will hold the reins and follow; if everyone follows, who will guard the altar of the state? If the king returns to his country and has private interests, isn't it wrong?" He did not arrange the city.
When you first meet a gentleman, you say, "I really want to be known by the general." You cannot get in touch with the master. The enemy says, "I really want to see you." If you rarely meet him, you say, "I have heard of you." If you meet him quickly, you say, "I have seen you every morning and evening." The blind say, "I have heard of you." If someone is in mourning, you say, "I will see you soon." A boy says, "I will listen to the affairs." If you are in mourning for a minister, you say, "I will listen to the servants of the Minister of Education." If the king is going to marry someone else, if the minister gives gold, jade, and other valuables to the king, he says, "Give money for horses to the officials"; the enemy says, "Give gifts to the attendants." If the minister gives a gift to the king, he says, "Give old clothes to the merchant"; the enemy says, "The 襚." If the relatives are brothers, they will not be promoted with the 襚. The minister serves the king.
When cleaning the feces for an elder, one must put a broom on the dustpan and use the sleeves to hold it back; if the dust does not reach the elder, one can use the dustpan from the home side to scoop it up. The seat is like a bridge. Where shall we sit and where shall we put our clothes? Xi: Among the south and north, the west is the best; among the east and west, the south is the best.
Confucius said: Those who make Mingqi know the way of funeral, and they prepare things but cannot use them. Alas! The dead are used with the utensils of the living. Isn't it dangerous to use them as sacrifices? Mingqi means to show the gods. Painting carts with straw spirits has existed since ancient times, and it is the way of Mingqi. Confucius said that those who make straw spirits are good, and those who make figurines are unkind - isn't it dangerous to use people!
When Wei Jie came to Xiadu from Yuzhang, people had heard of his name for a long time, and the crowds of people who came to see him were like a wall. Jie had a weak constitution before and his body could not bear the fatigue, so he fell ill and died. People at that time said, "Wei Jie was watched to death."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
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