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Chengren had a brother who died but did not wear mourning clothes. When he heard that Zigao would be the chief minister of Chengren, he wore mourning clothes. Chengren said, "Silkworms weave and crabs have ribs, fan weaves and cicadas have ribbons. When his brother died, Zigao wore mourning clothes."
When Bo Yu's mother died, he cried even after a certain period of time. The Master heard about it and said: "Who is crying with you?" The disciple said: "It's the carp." The Master said: "Hey! It's too much." Bo Yu heard about it and then got rid of it.
Wang Rong lost his son Wanzi. Shan Jian went to visit him, and the king was overwhelmed with grief. Jian said, "How could the thing in the child's arms be like this?" The king said, "The sages are oblivious to emotions, and the lowest among the poor are not even capable of emotions. Emotions are focused on people of our generation." Jian was convinced by his words and felt even more sad.
Yu Gong had a horse called Lu, and someone told him to sell it. Yu said: "If you sell it, there must be a buyer, which will harm the owner. Would you rather not be safe yourself and transfer it to others? In the past, Sun Shuao killed a two-headed snake for future generations. It was a good story in ancient times. If you follow his example, wouldn't you be wise?"
Ritual is to the right state: it is like a scale to weight, a ruler to straightness, and a compass to squareness. Therefore, if the scale is honestly hung, it cannot be deceived by the weight; if the ruler is honestly laid out, it cannot be deceived by the crookedness; if the rules are honestly set up, it cannot be deceived by the squareness and roundness; a gentleman examines the rites and cannot be accused of treachery. Therefore, those who respect the rites and follow the rites are called the gentlemen with the rules; those who do not respect the rites and do not follow the rites are called the people without the rules. It is the way of respect and yielding. Therefore, when serving the ancestral temple, one is respectful; when entering the court, the noble and the humble have their positions; when living at home, the father and son are close and the brothers are harmonious; when living in the village, the elders and the young are in order. Confucius said: "To settle the state and govern the people, nothing is better than rites." This is what he meant.
The betrothal gift is seven intermediaries for the upper duke, five intermediaries for the marquis and earl, and three intermediaries for the viscount and the man, so as to distinguish the noble from the humble. When introducing and conveying orders, a gentleman dares not question the one he respects, which is the utmost respect. After three concessions, he can convey the order, enter the temple gate after three concessions, reach the steps after three bows, and ascend after three concessions, so as to show respect and humility.
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