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Confucians have the same aspirations and the same principles. They are happy to be together and never get tired of each other. They do not believe rumors when they have not seen each other for a long time. They act according to their principles and establish righteousness. They advance when they are together and retreat when they are different. This is their friendship.
Zhong Sui died in Chui; Renwu was still buried, and Wanru went to the yue. Zhongni said, "It is not proper, you will not be buried." When Ji Kangzi's mother died, Gong Shuruo was still young, and the coffin was buried. Pan asked to seal it with a machine and follow it. The Duke shouldered the burden and said,
Eat for three days, bathe for three months, and practice after a period of time, so that destruction does not destroy nature, and death does not hurt life. Mourning does not exceed three years, and mourning clothes do not repair, and graves are not built; on auspicious days, white harps are played to inform the people of the end; this is a rule of moderation. From serving the father to serving the mother, and love the same. There is no two suns in the sky, no two kings on earth, no two rulers in a country, no two masters in a family, and they are all governed by one. Therefore, when the father is alive, the mother should mourn for the same period of mourning, which shows that there is no two masters.
Whenever Xi Chao heard that someone wanted to retire to a noble place, he would raise funds worth millions for them and build them a residence. He built a house for Dai Gong in Shan, which was very fine. Dai Shi went to his old residence and wrote to his relatives, saying, "I have just arrived in Shan and it is like an official residence." Xi also arranged for Fu to raise funds of one million yuan, but Fu was busy with some secret matters and therefore he was not left behind.
Lord Xie asked Wang Zijing, "How is your calligraphy compared to that of your father?" He replied, "Of course they are different." Lord Xie said, "Outsiders may say otherwise." The king said, "How can outsiders know?"
He Yan was the Minister of Personnel and held a prestigious position. His room was always filled with guests for conversation. Wang Bi, who was not yet twenty years old, went to see him. Yan heard of Bi's name, so he cited the superior theory of the previous one and said to Bi: "I think this theory is the best, can you challenge it again?" Bi then challenged, and everyone in the room thought he was inferior. So Bi acted as the host and the guest several times, but each time he was better than others.
Ziyun: "As for the father's hand, you can ride in his car but not wear his clothes. The gentleman uses this to expand filial piety." Confucius said: "The villain can all support their parents, but the gentleman is not respectful, how to distinguish?" Confucius said: "Father and son are not in the same position, so they are respectful." The Book of Documents says: "If you don't respect your ancestors, you will be disgraced." Confucius said: "When parents are alive, don't call them old, talk about filial piety but not kindness; inside the boudoir, play but don't sigh." The gentleman uses this to keep the people, and the people are still less filial and more kind. Confucius said: "The ruler of the people, the court respects the elderly, and then the people will be filial." Confucius said: "Sacrificial offerings have corpses, and they are the masters of the ancestral temples, which show the people that there is something to do. Repairing the ancestral temples and respecting the sacrifices are to teach the people to pursue filial piety." With this, the people still forget their parents.
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