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King Wen of Jin praised Ruan Sizong as extremely cautious. Whenever he spoke to him, his words were profound and far-reaching, and he never praised or criticized anyone.
When Lu Shiheng first entered Luoyang, he asked Zhang Gong where he should visit; Liu Daozhen was one of them. After Lu left, Liu was still in mourning. He was fond of drinking, and after the ceremony, he said nothing else at first, only asked: "There is a long-handled Hu Lu in Dongwu, can you get some?" The Lu brothers were very disappointed and regretted going.
Wang Hun’s second wife was a daughter of Yan from Langya. At that time, Wang was the governor of Xuzhou. After exchanging greetings, Wang was about to return the greeting, but the onlookers all said, "The king is a marquis and a governor of the state, and the new bride is a citizen of the state. I am afraid there is no way for us to return the greeting." So the king stopped. Wu Zi was afraid that his father did not respond to his greeting and the ceremony was not completed, so he was afraid that they were not husband and wife; he did not bow for him and said that he was Yan's concubine. The Yan family was ashamed of it. Because of his noble family background, I dared not leave.
Offering sacrifices and offering wine are respectful etiquette. Eating lungs is a ritual. Spitting wine is a ritual. At the end of the feast, it means that this is the main part of the feast, not just for eating and drinking, but for performing rituals. This is why rituals are valued and money is despised. After the cup is finished, it is placed on the west steps, which means that the feast is not just for eating and drinking. This is the meaning of putting rituals first and money second. If rituals are put first and money second, people will be respectful and yield without fighting.
When marrying a wife, one should not marry someone with the same surname as her. Therefore, if one buys a concubine but does not know her surname, one should consult the divination. If a widow's son has no opinion on him, he should not be friends with him.
Taiwei Wang said: "I see that Pei Linggong is smart and bright, surpassing others, and has extraordinary wisdom. If he can be revived after death, I will die with him." Some people said it was Wang Rong's words.
The Master said: "What is etiquette? It is the management of affairs. The gentleman has his affairs, and he must manage them. To govern the country without etiquette is like a blind man without friends. What can the entourage do? It is like someone who seeks in a dark room all night, how can he see without a candle? If there is no etiquette, then the hands and feet will not be able to move, the ears and eyes will not be able to add, and the advance and retreat, bowing and yielding will not be controlled. Therefore, if it is used in the residence, the elder and the younger will lose their distinction; the boudoir and the three clans will lose their harmony; the court and the official titles will lose their order; hunting and military affairs will lose their strategies; the army and military achievements will lose their rules; the palace will lose its measure; the tripod will lose its image; the food will lose its time; the music will lose its mode; the car will lose its style; the ghosts and gods will lose their feast; the funeral will lose its sorrow; the debate will lose its party; the official will lose its form; the government affairs will lose its implementation; it will be imposed on the body and mishandled in front, and all the actions of the crowd will lose their appropriateness. In this way, there is no way to reconcile with the crowd. ”
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