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When Wang Wendu was the chief secretary of Duke Huan, Duke Huan asked for a daughter from the king for his son, and the king agreed to ask for a daughter from Lantian. After returning, Lantian missed Wendu very much and still held him on his lap even though he had grown up. Wendu then told Huan that he wanted his daughter's knee. Lantian was furious and pushed Wendu to his knees and said, "What a shame! Wendu is foolish again. Are you afraid of Huan Wen? How can you marry your daughter to him?" Wendu replied, "My family has found a marriage place first." Duke Huan said, "I know it. It's just that your Excellency doesn't want to." Later, Huan's daughter married Wendu's son.
Serving a gentleman, when a gentleman ascends or descends, he hands him a rein; when he starts to ride, he must show respect; when a gentleman descends, he must stand back. When riding in a second carriage, he must show respect, but not in the assistant carriage. For the second carriage, the princes have seven, the senior officials have five, and the junior officials have three. The horses and carriages of the two-carriage man are not to be trifled with. Look at the clothes, swords, and horses of the gentleman, and do not buy them.
Deng Ai stuttered and called himself "Ai Ai". King Wen of Jin teased him and said, "You say 'Ai Ai', how many Ai are you talking about?" He replied, "Phoenix, Phoenix, so it is one Phoenix."
Wang Wuzi is good at understanding the nature of horses. I once rode a horse, with chopsticks and money stuck in the mud. There is water in front of him, but he refuses to cross it all day. Wang Yun said, "This must be a barrier caused by mud." He asked someone to remove it and then crossed over.
Offering sacrifices and offering wine are respectful etiquette. Eating lungs is a ritual. Spitting wine is a ritual. At the end of the feast, it means that this is the main part of the feast, not just for eating and drinking, but for performing rituals. This is why rituals are valued and money is despised. After the cup is finished, it is placed on the west steps, which means that the feast is not just for eating and drinking. This is the meaning of putting rituals first and money second. If rituals are put first and money second, people will be respectful and yield without fighting.
Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
Ziyun said: "If the superiors consider the words of the people, then the heaven will give them favors; if the superiors do not consider the words of the people, then they will be offended; if the heaven does not give them favors, then there will be chaos. 鈥漈herefore, if a gentleman governs the people with trust and humility, the people will repay him with respect. The Book of Songs says, 鈥淭he ancients had a saying: consult with common people.鈥
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