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Taoist Daoyi was fond of embellishing his words and sounds. He left the capital and returned to Dongshan, passing through Wuzhong. It started snowing soon after, but it wasn't very cold yet. The Taoists asked about the path they were on. Yi Gong said: "Wind and frost are not to be taken into account, but they are the first to gather the bleakness. The suburbs and towns are just beginning to fade, and the forests and mountains are already white."
The one who makes an adult will be required to perform the etiquette of adulthood. The one who requires the etiquette of adulthood will be required to perform the etiquette of being a son, a younger brother, a minister, and a younger person. If the four behaviors are performed on people, can the etiquette not be important?
Zishang did not mourn when his mother died. His disciples asked Zisi, “Did your ancestors mourn their mothers?” He said, “Yes”. “Why did you not let Bai mourn?” Zisi said, “My ancestors did not lose the way; when the way was high, they followed the way; when the way was low, they followed the way. How could Ji do that? Those who marry Ji are Bai’s mother; those who do not marry Ji are not Bai’s mother.” Therefore, the Kong family did not mourn their mothers when their mothers died, starting with Zisi.
He Cidao and Yu Jijian were both prime ministers. When Emperor Cheng died, the successor was not decided yet. He wanted to establish his son as the heir. Yu Ji and the court thought that the foreign invaders were strong and the heir was young, so they established Emperor Kang. When Emperor Kang ascended the throne, he convened a meeting with his ministers and said to He, "Whose advice is it that has enabled me to inherit the great cause today?" He replied, "Your Majesty's ascension to the throne is the result of Yu Bing's achievement, not my effort. If you had followed my humble advice at that time, you would not be able to see the prosperous Ming Dynasty now." The emperor looked ashamed.
When the princes send out their wives, the wives will come to their country with the etiquette of wives; when they arrive, they will enter with wives. The messenger was about to order, saying, "My lord is incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I have sent my envoy to report this to the steward." The host replied, "My lord has already refused to teach me before. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The officials laid out the utensils; the host's officials also received them. When the wife left, the husband sent someone to bring her back, saying, "I am incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The host replied, "My son is unfilial. I dare not avoid punishment. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The messenger withdrew, and the host bowed to see him off. If the uncle is alive, he should be called uncle; if the uncle is dead, he should be called brother; if there is no brother, he should be called husband. The host's resignation was, "My son is unfilial." If they were aunts or sisters, they would also be called.
The emperor's wife is called the queen, the princes are called the lady, the great officials are called the young lady, the scholars are called the woman, and the common people are called the wife.
Ruan Ji's sister-in-law once came back home, and Ji saw her and said goodbye to her. Or ridicule it. Ji said, "Is the etiquette designed for people like us?"
When Ruan Ji was about to bury his mother, he steamed a fat pig, drank two buckets of wine, and then when he said goodbye, he bluntly said, "I am poor!" They all had to take number one, and because of vomiting blood, they were disabled for a long time.
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