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When Duke Yu was the Protector General, he asked Huan Tingwei to find a good official, and the search lasted for years. Queen Huan met Xu Ning and learned about it, so she told Yu Gong: "What others should have, you don't have to have; what others should not have, you don't have to not have. He is truly a pure man in the sea and mountains."
When Wang Changshi and Liu Zhen met again after a long separation, Wang said to Liu, "You have made more progress." Liu replied, "It is just like the sky is high above me."
When Kong Wenju was ten years old, he went to Luo with his father. At that time, Li Yuanli was famous and served as the Inspector of the Capital Region. Only those with outstanding talents and reputation, as well as those who were his cousins, were allowed to visit him. When Wen Ju arrived at the gate, he said to the clerk, "I am the relative of Lord Li." After being let in, he sat down in front. Yuanli asked, "What is the relationship between you and me?" He replied, "In the past, my ancestor Confucius and your ancestor Boyang had a teacher-student relationship. So you and I have been friends for generations." Yuanli and the guests were all surprised. When Taizhong Daifu Chen Wei arrived later, people told him the same words. Wei said, “A child who is very smart when he is young may not be a good person when he grows up!” Wen Ju said, “I think you must have been very smart when you were young!” Wei was very embarrassed.
Li Pingyang, a son of Qinzhou, was a famous scholar in China. At that time, he was compared to Wang Yifu. Sun Xiuchu wanted to establish his authority, but Xian said, "Le Ling is popular among the people and should not be killed. Those who reduce Li Zhong do not deserve to be killed either." So he forced Zhong to commit suicide. At first, Chong was at home, and someone walked in through the door and took out a piece of paper from his bun to show Chong. He was aroused when he saw her again, so he went inside to show her to his daughter, who exclaimed "wonderful". When you understand his intention, you can commit suicide when you leave. This woman is very wise, and I always consult her.
Wang Changshi asked for Dongyang, but the military governor refused. Later, he became seriously ill and on his deathbed, Fujun lamented, "I will fail Zhongzu in this, and I will use him." The chief secretary said, "People say that the King of Kuaiji is stupid, he is really stupid."
Wang Dongting was the chief clerk of Xuanwu. One spring day, he and his brothers Shitou rode on horseback to the suburbs. Shi Yan and his fellow travelers marched together. Only one person from Dongting was always in front, and he could sense it several dozen steps away, but no one could understand it. Shitou and others were tired, and soon the imperial carriage returned. Everyone seemed to be an official, except Dongting Yiyi who was standing in front. His understanding is so quick.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
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