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The "Book of Rites" says: "Be respectful in every way, be solemn as if thinking, and speak calmly." It brings peace to the people!
"Confucians praise their relatives without avoiding relatives, and promote their relatives without avoiding enemies. They accumulate merits and deeds, promote the virtuous and promote them, and do not expect rewards. The king gets his will and does not seek wealth and honor as long as it benefits the country. They can promote the virtuous and support them like this.
Someone ridiculed Zhou Pushe: "When he joked with his relatives and friends, he was vulgar and undisciplined." Zhou said: "I am like the Yangtze River, how can I not have a song for a thousand miles?"
When Shusun Wushu's mother died, after the small coffin was buried, the person who carried it out of the house, stripped bare, and threw down his hat and tied his hair. Ziyou said, "You know the ritual." When the lord is supported, the fortune teller supports the right, and the archer supports the left; when the lord dies, it is carried out in this way.
It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. ” He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.
When Du Yu arrived in Jingzhou, he stopped at Qili Bridge and all the court officials came to pay their respects to him. When he was young, he was humble, fond of heroism, and was not satisfied with material things. Since Yang Ji was a famous figure, he was so brave and handsome that he left without sitting down. After a while, He Changyu came and asked, "Where is Yang Youwei?" The guest answered, "He left without sitting down just now." Changyu said, "He must be riding his horse under the Daya Gate." When they went to the Daya Gate, they indeed saw a large cavalry parade. The long carriage embraced the inner carriage and they were carried back together, and they sat as before.
Ritual: In the mourning of mourning with mourning clothes, one should only speak but not answer; in the mourning of mourning with mourning clothes, one should answer but not speak; in the mourning of great merit, one should speak but not discuss; in the mourning of small merit, one should discuss but not play music.
When Cai Situ crossed the river and saw Peng Xie, he was overjoyed and said, "Crabs have eight legs and two claws." He ordered them to be cooked. After eating, I vomited and felt exhausted, then I realized it was not crab. Later, he told Xie Renzu about this, and Xie said, "You are not familiar with Erya, and you almost died because of my persuasion to study."
A gentleman is one who is well-informed, strong in knowledge, and humble, and who is kind and not lazy. A gentleman does not exhaust people's favors or exhaust people's loyalty, but maintains friendship.
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