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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Wei Jiangzhou is in Xunyang. Some people knew that an old friend had gone there, but they did not take care of him. They only gave him one pound of "Wangbuliuxing" as a reward. After receiving the supplies, this man ordered his carriage to proceed. Li Hongfan heard about it and said, "My uncle is mean and he is using plants and trees as slaves."
When Zhou Jun was the governor of Andong, he went hunting and encountered a rainstorm, so he passed by Li's family in Runan. The Li family is wealthy, but the man is not around. There was a girl named Luoxiu. Upon hearing that there was a distinguished person outside, she and a maidservant slaughtered pigs and sheep inside and prepared food for dozens of people. They did everything very carefully and no sound of anyone was heard. He secretly observed her and saw a girl with an extraordinary appearance, so Jun asked her to be his concubine. My father and brother don’t allow it. Luoxiu said: "Our family is ruined, why should we cherish a daughter? If she marries into a noble family, it may be of great benefit in the future." Her father and brother agreed. Then the brothers Bo Ren were born. Luo Xiu said to Bo Ren and others: "The reason why I humble myself and serve as a concubine in your family is for the sake of our family. If you don't become a close relative of my family, I will not cherish the rest of my life." Bo Ren and others obeyed her orders. As a result, Li was able to enjoy a good fortune during his lifetime.
Hua Xin and Wang Lang both took refuge on a boat. There was a man who wanted to seek refuge, but Xin refused. Lang said, "Fortunately, there is still time, so why not?" Later, the enemy caught up with him, and the king wanted to abandon the people he was carrying. Xin said, "This is exactly why I was suspicious in the first place. Now that he has entrusted himself to me, why should I abandon him so quickly?" So he took Zheng with him as before. The world uses this to determine the superiority and inferiority of Hua and Wang.
Offering sacrifices and offering wine are respectful etiquette. Eating lungs is a ritual. Spitting wine is a ritual. At the end of the feast, it means that this is the main part of the feast, not just for eating and drinking, but for performing rituals. This is why rituals are valued and money is despised. After the cup is finished, it is placed on the west steps, which means that the feast is not just for eating and drinking. This is the meaning of putting rituals first and money second. If rituals are put first and money second, people will be respectful and yield without fighting.
When Wang Rong was seven years old, he used to play with other children. Look at the roadside plum trees with many fruits on their branches. All the children rushed to get it, but Rong did not move. When people asked him about it, he replied, "The tree grows by the road and has many fruits. It must be bitter plums." I picked them and found them to be true.
When Huan Xuanwu went on a northern expedition, Yuan Hu followed him, but was reprimanded and dismissed from office. I will have to announce the news, and call Yuan Yima to write it. He kept writing and soon had seven sheets of paper, which were quite impressive. Dongting was standing beside him and was greatly impressed by his talent. Yuan Hu said: "You should make your teeth and tongue idle and benefit from it."
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