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The etiquette for being a son is: be warm in winter and cool in summer, be alert at dusk and check on others in the morning, and do not argue with the ugly and the barbaric.
When a person dies, he should not be idle for three days, and he should not be relieved for three months. He should be sad for three years, and he should be worried for three years - this is the killing of grace. The sage uses killing to control moderation, and this is why mourning lasts for three years. The wise should not go beyond the limit, and the unworthy should not fail to reach the limit. This is the mean of mourning, and it is what the king always does. The Book of Documents says: "Emperor Gaozong was lenient and did not speak for three years." This is good; all kings should follow this ritual. Why is it good for him alone? It is said: Emperor Gaozong was Wu Ding; Wu Ding was a wise king of the Yin Dynasty. He succeeded the throne and was kind and good at mourning. At this time, the Yin Dynasty declined and revived, and rituals were abolished and revived, so he did it well. Because it was good, it was recorded in the book and praised, so he was called Emperor Gaozong. During the three-year mourning, the king did not speak. The Book of Documents says: "Emperor Gaozong was lenient and did not speak for three years." This is what it means. However, those who say "speaking without culture" refer to the ministers.
Han Kang's aunt Yin followed Sun Huizhi to Hengyang and met Huan Nanjun in Heluzhou. Bian Ju was his grandson and came to inquire about his life from time to time. He said to Ju: "If I don't die, I will see this guy become a thief for the second time!" After several years in Hengyang, Huizhi encountered the disaster of Huan Jingzhen. Yin stroked his corpse and cried, "Your father was dismissed from Yuzhang, and the conscription letter was sent out in the morning and evening. You left the county for several years, and you were unable to move because of things, and then you were caught in the disaster. What else can I say?"
Hua Xin and Wang Lang both took refuge on a boat. There was a man who wanted to seek refuge, but Xin refused. Lang said, "Fortunately, there is still time, so why not?" Later, the enemy caught up with him, and the king wanted to abandon the people he was carrying. Xin said, "This is exactly why I was suspicious in the first place. Now that he has entrusted himself to me, why should I abandon him so quickly?" So he took Zheng with him as before. The world uses this to determine the superiority and inferiority of Hua and Wang.
Always watch your young children and don't tell them lies; don't let little boys wear fur clothes. The foundation must be square. Not listening. If an elder helps him, he should hold the elder's hands with both hands. He carried a sword on his back and answered with his mouth covered.
When Xiahou Xuan was put in shackles, Zhong Yu was appointed as the Minister of Justice. Zhong Hui, who did not know Xuan at first, became close to him. Xuan said, "Although I am a survivor of torture, I dare not obey your order!" He said nothing during the interrogation at first, but his expression did not change when he was about to be executed in the East Market.
When Wang Rong was a young man, he visited Ruan Ji. Liu Gongrong was also present. Ruan said to the king, "I happen to have two buckets of fine wine, and I would like to drink it with you. That Gong Rong has no right to drink it." The two men exchanged cups, and Gong Rong did not get a single drink. But when it came to talking and discussing drama, the three of them were no different. When someone asked him about this, Ruan replied, "Those who are more honorable than you have to drink with; those who are less honorable than you have to drink with; only those who are honorable as you have to drink with you can not drink with you."
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