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The wife of Duke Cheng of Pei, the daughter of Wang Rong. Wang Rong went to Pei Xu in the morning, but there was no way forward. Pei went down from the bed to the south, and the woman went down from the bed to the north, and they sat opposite each other as host and guest, with no strange expressions on their faces.
There was a morning auspicious event in Lu, but no one sang. Zilu laughed at him. The Master said, "You, you blame others, and never stop? The three-year mourning period is already long." Zilu left, and the Master said, "How long? If it lasts more than a month, it will be good."
The way of a gentleman is like starting from near when he wants to go far, and starting from low when he wants to climb high. The Book of Songs says: "Wife and wife are in harmony, like playing the harp and the lyre. Brothers are in harmony, and they are happy and indulgent. Be good to your family, and enjoy your wife and money." Confucius said: "Parents are obedient!"
All the learning of the crown prince and the scholars must be in season. In spring and summer, they learn to play the sword and spear, and in autumn and winter, they learn to play the feather and flute, all in the East Sequence. The minor music director learns the sword and spear, and the big official assists him. The flute master learns the spear and the flute master assistant assists him. The official plays the drum in the south. In spring, he recites and in summer, the master orders him. In autumn, Gu Zong learns the ritual, and the person in charge of the ritual orders him; in winter, he reads and the person in charge of the book orders him. The ritual is in Gu Zong, and the book is in Shangxiang. All the rituals of sacrifice, caring for the elderly, asking for words, and talking together are ordered by the minor music director in the East Sequence. The big music director learns to dance the sword and spear, speak, and ask for words, all of which are taught by the big music director, and the big official discusses and discusses in the East Sequence.
The Duke said, 鈥淢ay I ask what is meant by respecting oneself?鈥 Confucius replied, 鈥淲hen a gentleman speaks too much, the people will make excuses; when he acts too much, the people will make examples. If a gentleman does not speak too much and does not act too much, the people will respect him without being ordered. In this way, he can respect himself; if he can respect himself, he can complete his parents. 鈥漈he Duke said, 鈥淢ay I ask what is meant by completing his parents?鈥 Confucius replied, 鈥淎 gentleman is a name for people. The people call him a son of a gentleman. This is to make their parents become gentlemen, and this is to complete their parents鈥 name!鈥 Confucius then said, 鈥淚n ancient times, the most important thing in governing was to love people. If you cannot love people, you cannot have your body; if you cannot have your body, you cannot be at peace with your land; if you cannot be at peace with your land, you cannot be happy with heaven; if you cannot be happy with heaven, you cannot complete your body.鈥
Therefore, the teaching of ritual is subtle, and it can stop evil before it takes shape, making people move towards good and stay away from crimes without knowing it. That is why the ancient kings respected it. The Book of Changes says: "A gentleman should be cautious at the beginning, and the error of a millimeter will lead to a thousand miles." This is what it means.
When Xie Wan went on the northern expedition, he often whistled and sang to show off his superiority, and never tried to comfort his soldiers. Xie Gong loved Wan very much, but he knew that he would definitely fail, so he went with him. Congrong said to Wan: "You are the marshal, you should invite the generals to banquets more often to win their hearts." Wan followed his advice. He summoned all the generals, but none of them said anything. He just pointed at the four people sitting around him and said, "You are all strong soldiers." The generals were very angry. In order to express his gratitude and trust, Mr. Xie personally visited everyone from the captain of the army to the commander-in-chief and expressed his sincere gratitude. When everything went wrong, the army wanted to get rid of him. He then said, "I should become a hermit." So fortunately he was spared.
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