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The Duke said, “May I ask what is meant by respecting oneself?” Confucius replied, “When a gentleman speaks too much, the people will make excuses; when he acts too much, the people will make examples. If a gentleman does not speak too much and does not act too much, the people will respect him without being ordered. In this way, he can respect himself; if he can respect himself, he can complete his parents. ”The Duke said, “May I ask what is meant by completing his parents?” Confucius replied, “A gentleman is a name for people. The people call him a son of a gentleman. This is to make their parents become gentlemen, and this is to complete their parents’ name!” Confucius then said, “In ancient times, the most important thing in governing was to love people. If you cannot love people, you cannot have your body; if you cannot have your body, you cannot be at peace with your land; if you cannot be at peace with your land, you cannot be happy with heaven; if you cannot be happy with heaven, you cannot complete your body.”
In the case of parents' funeral, after the funeral, people cry, and the pillars, lintels and screens are cut, and do not wear sackcloth or bees; after a period of time, a small funeral is held, people live in a whitened room, and sleep on mats; after another period of time, a big funeral is held, people live and sleep again; in the middle of the month, people mourn, and use a bed.
The general principles of all rituals are to follow the heaven and earth, follow the four seasons, follow the yin and yang, and follow human nature, so they are called rituals. Those who criticize them do not know where rituals come from. Rituals, good and bad, are different, and cannot be interrelated, which is derived from yin and yang. There are four rules for mourning, which change according to the situation, which is derived from the four seasons. There are grace, reason, moderation, and power, which are derived from human nature. Grace is benevolence, reason is righteousness, moderation is ritual, and power is knowledge. Benevolence, righteousness, propriety, and wisdom are all human nature.
There was a great famine in Qi, and Qian Ao prepared food on the road for the hungry to eat. A hungry man came in a hurry with his sleeves and shoes covered. Qian Ao held food in his left hand and drink in his right hand, saying, "Come and eat." He looked at him with his eyes wide open, and said, "I only don't eat food brought by whining, so I have come to this." Then he thanked him; he died without eating. Zengzi heard about it and said, "Is it not true? His whining can be left, and his apology can be eaten."
The wild of the herds was an important matter for King Wu. After the matter was over, he retired, offered firewood to the God of Heaven, prayed to the community, and set up sacrifices in the herdsman's room. Then he led the princes of the world, holding the bowls and trays, and ran away; chasing the great king Danfu, King Jili, and King Wenchang; he did not use the inferior to look down on the superior. He governed his ancestors, which was to respect the superior; he governed his descendants, which was to be kind to his relatives; he governed his brothers and sisters, and fed the whole clan, arranged them according to the order of the ancestors, and distinguished them according to the rites and righteousness, and the human way was exhausted.
Then the bald people do not strip, the hunchbacks do not bare, and the lame people do not jump, not because they are not sad; if the body is sick, it is not suitable for the ritual. Therefore, it is said: the funeral ceremony is mainly about mourning. Women cry and mourn, beat their chests and feel sad; men cry and mourn, bow their heads and touch the ground, which is the extreme of sorrow.
Arrogance cannot be allowed to grow excessive, desires cannot be followed, ambitions cannot be satisfied, and happiness cannot be taken to the extreme.
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