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Mr. Huo, your wife ran away again

The Lucky Anchor

When Lu Wan was appointed Sikong, someone came to him and asked for good wine. When he got it, he stood up, dropped his chopsticks on the ground between the beams and pillars, and said, "There is a lack of talent in the world, so I use you as a pillar. Please don't destroy the pillars of others." He joked, "I will take your good advice."

The president and I are having an affair again.

Someone asked the prime minister, "How does Zhou Hou compare to He Qiao?" He replied, "A long carriage with rugged branches."

Your Highness, please treat everyone equally.

When Grand Marshal Huan came down to the capital, he asked Zhenzhang, "I heard that the King of Kuaiji said that you are very advanced. Is that you?" Liu said, "You are very advanced, so you are the second-rate people!" Huan asked, "Who are the first-rate people?" Liu said, "It's us!"

Van Gogh's Left Ear

Sun Xing said: "The talent of Cao's assistant is like a white brocade with bright light, cut into a pair of trousers with a back pattern. It is not without literary talent, but it is cruel and has no tailoring."

The owner's wife wants to divorce

　　A guest once asked Chen Jifang, "What merits and virtues did your lord Taiqiu have to deserve such high reputation?" Jifang replied, "My lord is like a laurel tree growing on the edge of Mount Tai, which is ten thousand feet high and unfathomably deep. It is moistened by the sweet dew above and moistened by the deep spring below. At that time, how could the laurel tree know the height of Mount Tai and the depth of the deep spring? It didn't know whether it had merits or not!"