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The etiquette for being a son is: be warm in winter and cool in summer, be alert at dusk and check on others in the morning, and do not argue with the ugly and the barbaric.
In this month, the day is the longest, and the yin and yang are in conflict, and life and death are divided. Gentlemen should be vigilant, and they must cover their bodies when they are at home, and not be impatient. They should stop listening to music and not let anyone come. They should eat less and not be too harmonious. Control your desires, calm your mind, and keep all officials quiet and free from punishment, so as to determine the achievements of the late Yin. Deer antlers fall off, cicadas begin to sing. Pinellia grows, and violets bloom. In this month, do not use fire in the south. You can live in high and bright places, look far away, climb mountains and hills, and live in terraces.
Wang Ziyou lived in Shanyin. It snowed heavily at night. He woke up, opened the room, and ordered wine to be poured. The sky was bright all around, so I stood up and imitated the poet, reciting Zuo Si's poem to invite hermits. Suddenly I remembered Dai Andao, who was in Shan at that time, so I took a small boat to visit him at night. After walking a night, he finally arrived, but he opened the door without going forward and turned back. When asked why, the king said, "I went out for fun and returned when the fun wore off. Why should I see Dai?"
Lu Aigong asked Confucius, "Master, are your clothes Confucian clothes?" Confucius replied, "When I was young, I lived in Lu and wore a Fengye robe. When I grew up, I lived in Song and wore a Zhangfu hat. I have heard that a gentleman's learning is extensive, and his clothes are rustic; I don't know Confucian clothes."
An old friend of Confucius was Yuanrang. When his mother died, Confucius helped her wash the coffin. Yuanrang climbed a tree and said, "It has been a long time since I have trusted music." The song went, "The spotted head of a raccoon, holding the curled hand of a woman." Confucius passed by as someone who did not hear it. The follower said, "Can't you stop?" Confucius said, "I have heard that relatives should not lose their relatives, and the old ones should not lose their old ones."
The husband of the mother and the wife of the uncle, the two wives mourn for each other, but the gentleman did not mention it. Some say that they cook together.
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