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When Nangong Jiang's wife's aunt died, the Master taught her to wear her hair in a bun, saying, "Don't follow others, don't follow others. The hairpin is made of hazel, one foot long and eight inches in total."
Confucius said: "The Way is not far from people. If people practice the Way and distance themselves from others, they cannot be considered the Way. The Book of Songs says: 'Cut the wood, chop the wood, its principle is not far away.' Holding a stick to chop wood, looking at it from a distance, it still seems far away. Therefore, a gentleman governs people by their own way, and stops when he changes. Loyalty and forgiveness are not far from the Way. If you do not want to do it yourself, do not do it to others. There are four ways of a gentleman, and I have not been able to do any of them. What I ask of my son is to serve my father, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my minister is to serve my king, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my younger brother is to serve my elder brother, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my friends is to give them first, but I have not been able to do it. The actions of a mediocre person are cautious; if there is something that is lacking, he dare not not try hard, and if there is something that is more than enough, he dare not use it all; if he speaks, he will act accordingly, and if he acts, he will act accordingly. Why does a gentleman not have to be frank!"
When Taiji Hall was first completed, Wang Zijing was the chief secretary of Lord Xie. Xie sent a plate to Wang to have him write on it. The king looked dissatisfied and said to Xin, "You can throw the chopsticks outside the door." Later, Xie saw the king and said, "What about hanging the inscription in the upper hall? In the past, people like Wei Dan in the Wei Dynasty also wrote it themselves." The king said, "That's why the Wei Dynasty did not last long." Xie thought it was a famous saying.
Emperor Ming of Wei cut off the tiger's claws and fangs in Xuanwu Field and allowed the people to watch. Wang Rong, who was seven years old, also went to see him. Hu Chengxian climbed up the fence and roared, the sound shook the earth, and all the onlookers were frightened and fell down. Rong Zhanran remained motionless and showed no fear at all.
Kong Wenju had two sons, the elder one was six years old and the younger one was five years old. While his father was sleeping during the day, the younger one would steal wine from the bedside and drink it. The eldest son asked, "Why don't you bow?" He replied, "I stole, so how can I bow?"
Therefore, only after the behaviors of filial piety, brotherhood, loyalty and obedience are established, can one be a man; only after being a man can one govern others. Therefore, the sage kings valued etiquette. Therefore, it is said that the cap is the beginning of etiquette and the most important thing for good things. Therefore, the ancients valued the cap; the cap was performed in the temple; the temple was performed to respect things; respect things and dare not take the initiative to do things; do not take the initiative to do things, so they humble themselves and respect the ancestors.
General Wang wrote to Emperor Yuan: "Shu Feng is simple and upright, and he is a refined person. He is more profound than others. He is the one I have known since I was young. Yi Fu and Cheng said: 'You know Chu Ming and Mao Hong. Mao Hong has a good reputation, and he really matches your clear opinion. Chu Ming is close to no one who knows him. I always take your words into consideration, but I have not achieved anything. I am afraid you have regretted it.' I said with emotion: 'You have tried it with this, and only recently have people praised him.' It means that ordinary people are worried that knowing too much will lead to mistakes, and not knowing how to live up to the reality."
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