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Zeng Zi asked: "After the wedding ceremony, the money is paid and there is an auspicious day, if the girl's parents die, what should be done?" Confucius said: "The husband sends condolences. If the husband's parents die, the girl's family also sends condolences. Father's death is called father, mother's death is called mother. If parents are not alive, uncle's mother is called. After the husband is buried, the husband's uncle tells the girl: 'So-and-so's son has lost his parents, and cannot be a brother, so-and-so tells the girl.' The girl agrees, but dares not marry. This is rite. The husband is exempted from mourning. The girl's parents send people to invite him, but the husband refuses to accept him, and then he marries her. This is rite. If the girl's parents die, the husband also does the same. "
Therefore, a gentleman should be cautious and not lose his face in front of others. The king should be polite, and the ministers should be inferior to him. The ministers should be polite, and the scholars should be inferior to him. Etiquette should not be given to common people, and punishment should not be given to ministers. Punishers should not be at the king's side.
The gentleman said: "Gently accept harmony, and accept white; loyal and faithful people can learn etiquette. If there is no loyal and faithful person, etiquette will not be in vain. Therefore, it is precious to get the right person. Confucius said: "Reciting three hundred poems in the Book of Songs is not enough for one offering. The ceremony of one offering is not enough for a great feast. The ceremony of a great feast is not enough for a great group. The great group is ready, but it is not enough for the feast of the emperor." Don't discuss etiquette lightly! Zilu was the chief of Ji's family. Ji's family offered sacrifices at dusk, and when the day was not enough, they continued with candles. Even if there is a strong face and a solemn and respectful heart, they are all tired. The officials limped and leaned to attend the sacrifice, which was a great disrespect. On other days when offering sacrifices, Zilu would be present. The affairs of the inner room would be handled at the door, and the affairs of the hall would be handled at the steps. They would start their activities at dawn and leave at dusk. Confucius heard this and said, "Who says that You doesn't know etiquette?
After Huan Xuan usurped the throne, he was about to set up a direct office and asked his attendants, "Where should the Huben Zhonglang Office be located?" Someone answered, "There is no office." This was extremely against the emperor's will at the time. I asked, "How do you know there is none?" He answered, "Pan Yue wrote in his Autumn Poem, 'I am also the General of the Tiger Guards, and I am in charge of the Ministry of Cavalry.' Xuan Zi praised it.
General Wang said in front of everyone, "There has never been anyone who became one of the Three Dukes in the Zhou Dynasty." Someone answered, "Only Zhou Hou Yi led five horses but failed to defeat him." The general said, "Zhou and I met at Luoyang and we were wiped out at once. The world was in turmoil and it has come to this!" He burst into tears.
Prime Minister Wang was frugal, and there were delicious fruits under his tent, which were always abundant. When the spring came, the army was rotten and the governor reported it to the emperor, who ordered them to leave. He said, "Be careful not to let Dalang know."
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