比较搞笑的欧美电影

Me and my charming female boss

In the past, Confucius and the wax guests were together. After the event, they went out to the pavilion and sighed. Confucius sighed, probably sighing for Lu. Yan Yan, who was standing by, said: "Why do you sigh, gentleman?" Confucius said: "The practice of the great way, with the heroes of the three dynasties, I have not yet reached them, but I have the ambition to do so." The practice of the great way makes the world public. Select the virtuous and the capable, talk about trust and cultivate harmony, so that people not only love their relatives and their children, but also make sure that the old have a place to live, the strong have a place to work, the young have a place to grow, and the widowed, lonely, disabled and sick are all taken care of. Men have their share, and women have their home. Goods are not worth throwing away, so they don't have to keep them for themselves; strength is not worth using, so it doesn't have to be used for oneself. Therefore, plots are closed and not raised, thefts and riots are not committed, and the outer doors are not closed. This is called the Great Harmony. Now that the great way is hidden, the world is like a family. Everyone loves his relatives and his children. He uses his goods and strength for himself. The great people follow the etiquette of the generations. The city walls, ditches and ponds are used as a defense, and the etiquette and righteousness are used as a discipline; to correct the relationship between the ruler and the minister, to be loyal to the father and son, to be harmonious with the brothers, to be harmonious with the husband and wife, to establish the system, to establish the fields, to be virtuous, brave and knowledgeable, and to take credit for one's achievements. Therefore, plots are made from this, and wars are raised from this. Yu, Tang, Wen, Wu, King Cheng, and Duke Zhou were selected from this. There is no one among these six gentlemen who does not observe etiquette. To show the righteousness, to test the trustworthiness, to show the faults, to punish the kind and to encourage the yielding, to show the people that there is a constant. If there are those who do not follow this, those in power will leave, and the people will think it is a disaster. This is called the well-off society. Yan Yan asked again, "Is this why etiquette is so urgent?" Confucius said, "Etiquette is what the ancient kings used to follow the way of heaven and to govern people's emotions. Therefore, those who lose it die, and those who obtain it live. The Book of Songs says, 'The mouse has a body, but man is without etiquette; if man is without etiquette, why don't he die quickly?' Therefore, etiquette must be based on heaven, rubbed on earth, listed in ghosts and gods, and applied to funerals, sacrifices, archery, weddings, and marriages. Therefore, the sages showed it with etiquette, so that the world and the country can be rectified." Yan Yan asked again, "Master, what you said about rituals, can I hear them?" Confucius said, "I wanted to observe the way of Xia, so I went to Qi, but it was not enough to prove it; I got the time of Xia there. I wanted to observe the way of Yin, so I went to Song, but it was not enough to prove it; I got Kun and Gan there. The meaning of Kun and Gan, the same as the time of Xia, I observe it in this way." At the beginning of rituals, they started with food and drink. They burned millet and ate pork, stained the cups and drank from them, beat drums with sticks, as if they could show respect to ghosts and gods. When they died, they climbed up the roof and cried, saying, "Gao! So-and-so is back." Then they ate fishy food and ate sorghum. Therefore, when the sky looks up and the earth hides, the body and soul descend, and the spirit is above. Therefore, the dead head north and the living face south, all in accordance with the beginning. In the past, the ancient kings did not have palaces. In winter, they lived in caves and in summer, they lived in nests. Before the invention of fire, people ate the fruits of plants and trees, the flesh of birds and beasts, drank their blood, and ate their fur. Before there was hemp and silk, people wore feathers and skins. Later, when sages came into being, they improved the benefits of fire, molded gold and mixed earth to build terraces, palaces, windows and doors, and used them for cannon fire, burning, roasting and roasting to make sweet and cheese; processed hemp and silk to make cloth, to nourish the body and send off the dead, to serve ghosts, gods and God, all in accordance with the beginning of the year. Therefore, dark wine is in the room, sweet wine is in the door, rice and milk are in the hall, and clear wine is in the room. They display their sacrifices, prepare their tripods and sacrificial vessels, arrange their zithers, pipes, chimes, bells and drums, and perform their prayers to bring down the gods and ancestors. This is to rectify the relationship between the ruler and the minister, to strengthen the father and son, to reconcile brothers, to make the upper and lower equal, and to make husband and wife have something. This is called receiving the blessing from heaven. Make a prayer, offer dark wine as sacrifice, offer blood and hair, smear the sacrificial table, prepare the meat, and place the feast on the table. Use thin cloth to cover the table, cover the washed silk, offer wine and wine, offer roasted meat, and the king and his wife offer sacrifices to cheer the souls. This is called Hemo. Then retreat and Heheng, and feel the dogs, pigs, cattle and sheep, and fill the food containers, dishes, and soups. Pray with filial piety and sing with kindness. This is called Daxiang. This is the great achievement of ritual.

Ghost Doctor

　　After Zhou Zhen left Linchuan County, he returned to the capital. Before he could take up residence, he moored at Qingxi Island. Prime Minister Wang went to see it. It was summer and a rainstorm suddenly came. The boat was so small and leaked so badly that there was almost no place to sit. The king said, "How can Hu Wei be more honest than this?" He immediately appointed him as the commander of Wuxing County.

The green mountains were once white with snow

Sun Xiu hated Shi Chong for not giving Lu Zhu to her, and also regretted that Pan Yue did not treat her with courtesy in the past. Later, Xiu became the Minister of the Central Secretariat. Yue saw him in the palace and called out to him, "Mr. Sun, do you remember what happened in the past?" Xiu said, "I kept it in my heart. How could I forget it?" Yue then realized that he would not be able to escape. Later, Shi Chong and Ouyang Jianshi were captured, and Yue was captured on the same day. Shi was sent to the market first, but they didn't know each other either. When Pan arrived later, Shi said to Pan, "Anren, are you the same as him?" Pan said, "It can be said that 'we will share the same home when we are old'." Pan Jingu collected a poem and said, "I entrust my fate to my friend Shi, and we will share the same home when we are old." This is how the prophecy came true.

We are only one step away from the corpse

The Abandoned Concubine

During Bo Gao's funeral, the envoys of the Kong family had not arrived yet, and Ran Zi took the silk bundle and rode a horse to lead them. Confucius said: "Strange! It makes me disloyal to Bo Gao."

The prince consort is the princess, the prince is too treacherous

Emperor Wu of Jin asked Sun Hao, "I heard that people in the south like to compose songs like 'You'. Can you compose it?" Hao was drinking, so he raised his cup to persuade the emperor and said, "I was your neighbor in the past, and now I am your subject. I'll give you a cup of wine, and may you live forever." The emperor regretted it.