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When Wang Ziyou went to thank Wan, Lord Lin was already there, looking at him with great respect. The king said, "If Mr. Lin had both his hair and beard intact, would his spirit and appearance be even better than this?" Xie said, "The lips and teeth are interdependent and cannot be separated. What do hair and beard have to do with spirit and appearance?" Mr. Lin was very unhappy. He said: "Today I entrust you two wise men with my seven-foot-tall body."
Therefore, a gentleman should be cautious about virtue first. If you have virtue, you will have people; if you have people, you will have land; if you have land, you will have wealth; if you have wealth, you will have usefulness. Virtue is the root, and wealth is the end. The root is outside and the end is inside, and the people are robbed. Therefore, when wealth is gathered, the people will be scattered; when wealth is scattered, the people will be gathered. Therefore, words that are perversely spoken will also be perversely received; goods that are perversely received will also be perversely sent out. "Kang Gao" says: "Only the mandate is not constant." If the way is good, you will gain it; if it is not good, you will lose it. "Chu Shu" says: "Chu has no treasure, only goodness is its treasure." Uncle Fan said: "The dead have no treasure, only benevolence and relatives are their treasure."
General Lu went to Prime Minister Wang to consult on matters, but he would change his mind afterwards. The prince was surprised by this and later asked Lu about it. Lu said: "You are superior to the people and inferior to them. At the time, I didn't know what to say, but later I realized that it was not right."
It is the festival of a boy. The black cloth clothes are brocade-edged, the brocade belt, and the button brocade, and the hair is all red brocade. Boys do not wear fur or silk, shoes or silk, and do not wear mourning clothes. Listening to affairs does not require hemp. If there is no business, he will stand to the north of the host and see the teacher enter with others. Those who serve food to the teacher with different titles will offer sacrifices later and eat first. When the guest offers sacrifices, the host declines and says, "It is not enough to offer sacrifices." When the guest eats, the host declines with a sparse. If the host prepares his own sauce, the guest will clean it himself. In a room, one person who is not a guest should clean up. In a meal, one person should clean up. In banquets, women should not clean up. When eating dates, peaches, and plums, do not take the core. When offering melons, throw away the rings in the middle of the food. Those who eat fruits should eat after the gentlemen, and those who light the fire should eat before the gentlemen. In celebrations, do not congratulate unless the king gives gifts. Confucius ate at Ji's house, and did not refuse. He did not eat meat and ate.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
When Yin Zhongkan was the governor of Jingzhou, there was a flood season and he usually ate only five bowls of food, with no other dishes. When rice grains fell on the plate or table, he would pick them up and eat them. Although we want to lead things, we must do so according to their true nature. I always tell my children, "Don't think that I am giving up my former ambitions because I have been appointed to a provincial post. It is not easy for me to be in this position now. Poverty is the norm for scholars. How can I climb the branch and abandon my roots? You should save it!"
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