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A gentleman knows the reasons why teaching is flourishing and the reasons why teaching is abolished, and then he can be a teacher. Therefore, the gentleman's teaching is to guide but not to force, to force but not to suppress, and to open but not to reach. If you follow the way but don't force it, you will be harmonious; if you are strong but don't suppress it, you will be easy; if you open but don't reach it, you will think; harmony and ease with thinking can be called good metaphor.
Confucius returned first, and his disciples came later. It was raining heavily. When he arrived, Confucius asked him: "Why are you so late?" He said: "The tomb in Fang collapsed." Confucius did not answer., Confucius burst into tears and said: "I heard that in ancient times, tombs were not repaired."
When the dukes met the emperor, they called themselves "minister so-and-so" and "hou so-and-so". When they talked with the people, they called themselves "guaren"; when they were in mourning clothes, they called themselves "shizigu". When they attended sacrifices, they called themselves "filial son so-and-so and hou so-and-so" in the inner court, and "great-grandson so-and-so and hou so-and-so" in the outer court. When they died, they called themselves "hong", and when they came back, they called themselves "so-and-so fu fu yi". When they met the emperor after the burial, it was called "lei jian". When they talked about posthumous titles, it was called "lei".
Hemp is not a robe, and holding jade is not hemp. Hemp is not added to the collection. When the country prohibits crying, it only stops the morning and evening offerings. It is self-made when ascending the throne. When a boy cries, he does not lie down, jump, stick, use a penny, or stay. Confucius said: "Aunts and uncles, when they are in poor condition, do not jump to the ground. When the great achievement of aunts and sisters, jump to the ground. If you know this, you are well-educated! Well-educated! ”
Wang Changshi was ill and his relatives and friends had difficulty communicating. When Lord Lin arrived, the gatekeeper immediately opened the door and said, "There is a stranger at the door. I dare not refuse to open the door." The king laughed and said, "This must be Lord Lin."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Sun Xinggong said: "Three capitals and two capitals, the Five Classics are preached."
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