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When Wen Bo died, Jing Jiang sat on his bed without crying, saying, "In the past, I had Si Zi, and I thought he would be a wise man, so I never went to the public office; now when he died, none of my friends and ministers shed tears, but the women in the house all cried loudly. Si Zi must have been very unruly!" When Ji Kangzi's mother died, he laid out his underwear. Jing Jiang said, "A woman who does not wear clothes dare not meet her parents-in-law. There will be guests from all over the world coming. Why should she display her underwear here?" She ordered to remove it.
The lowly should not mourn the noble, the young should not mourn the old, this is the etiquette. Only the emperor should be mourned by calling the heaven. The princes mourning each other is not etiquette.
Kong Tingwei gave the fur coat to his cousin Chen, but Chen refused to accept it. The Chief Justice said, "Yan Pingzhong was so frugal that he offered sacrifices to his ancestors. He wore a pig's shoulder that was not enough to cover his bowl, and he also wore a fox fur coat for decades. Why do you refuse this?" So he accepted it and wore it.
When Guo Zhaozi's mother died, he asked Zi Zhang, "At the funeral and tomb, what positions should men and women take?" Zi Zhang said, "At the funeral of Si Tu Jingzi, Confucius was the prime minister, and men faced west and women faced east." He said, "Ah! No." He said, "At my funeral, Si was involved. You are responsible for it, the guests are guests, the host is the host--women and men all face west."
Someone asked the military governor, "How good is Yin Hao in his talks?" He replied, "I can't beat others, but I can at least win the hearts of the people."
Ziyun said: "A country that values people and despises salary, then the people will yield to him; it values skills and despises vehicles, then the people will develop arts." Therefore, the gentleman is concise in his words, and the villain speaks first.
When Confucius was in Wei, he encountered the funeral of an old abbot. He went in and wept. When he left, he asked Zigong to persuade the charioteer and give him gifts. Zigong said, "I have never persuaded the charioteer for the funeral of my disciple. Is it too much to persuade the charioteer in the old abbot?" The Master said, "My fellow villagers went in and wept, and wept when they met a sad thing. I hate that I have no reason to cry. You should do it." When Confucius was in Wei, there were people attending the funeral, and the Master watched them and said, "How well they conduct the funeral! It is worthy of being a model. You should know it." Zigong said, "What is so good about you, Master?" He said, "When he went, he seemed to be longing, and when he returned, he seemed to be suspicious." Zigong said, "Is it better to return quickly and be anxious?" The Master said, "You know it, but I can't do it." When Yan Yuan died, he presented auspicious meat. Confucius went out to receive it, and then he played the zither and ate it.
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